app_tv: Small-screen Superstar

2007-08-21T13:45:00.000-04:00

OK, so in response to the one person who wrote to me and in case anyone else cares, the blog is on hold for a while. I'm swamped with a new post right now and have had no real free time. I'm hoping I can put something new together when the Press relaunches its Web site later this year.

What's on: Wednesday

2007-08-01T13:28:00.000-04:00

The finals begin on LAST COMIC STANDING (NBC/9 p.m.), including the initial immunity challenge and head-to-head competition. The second week of the semifinals ended up with much better comics than the first, demographic-filling week. Still not the 10 best, but a good bunch.

Back from the dead, temporarily at least, is THE NINE (ABC/10 p.m.) as the network burns off the unaired episodes of the failed serial.

Also new: So You Think You Can Dance and Don't Forget the Lyrics on Fox; American Inventor on ABC; Rescue Me on FX; Top Chef on Bravo; two episodes of Tyler Perry's House of Payne on TBS; and two episodes of WWE MSG Classics on MSG.

Note to readers

2007-08-01T13:23:00.000-04:00

Sorry I've been scarce recently. Working a lot recently. Will keep up as much as possible, but probably won't post as much as I'd like to. Suggestions about stuff to cover are still welcome and encouraged.

What's on: Tuesday

2007-07-31T13:44:00.000-04:00

Wrapping up its season tonight: SHAQ'S BIG CHALLENGE (ABC/9 p.m.), the well-meaning, uplifting reality show that no one watched. The kids will take the president's physical fitness test before meeting up with Florida's governor.

Two new shows debut tonight. First, there's Bravo's FLIPPING OUT (10 p.m.) which follows a mean, obsessive real estate investor through his work and dealings with his employees. Less importantly, there's MURDER (Spike/10 p.m), which challenges its contestants to solve murders with recreated scenes and evidence. If you're not excited.... well, you're certainly not the only one.

Also: Big Brother on CBS; Damages on FX; America's Got Talent and Singing Bee on NBC; On the Lot on Fox; Just for Laughs on ABC; Wide Angle and POV on PBS; Eureka and ECW on Sci-Fi; The Bronx is Burning on ESPN; Mindfreak and Dog on A&E.

What's on: Monday

2007-07-30T13:33:00.000-04:00

New tonight: Age of Love on NBC; Hell's Kitchen on Fox; contrived reality show Six Degrees of Martina McBride on ABC; Big Love on HBO; Heartland, Closer and Saving Grace on TNT; Kyle XY and Greek on ABC Family; and the premiere of the new season of My Boys.

What's on: Friday

2007-07-27T02:37:00.000-04:00

New tonight: Set for Life on ABC; Smackdown on CW; Monk and Psych on USA; Best Week Ever on VH1; Dr. Who and Painkiller Jane on Sci-fi; The Soup on E.

Jericho catchup starts at 9 p.m. on CBS. Watch it. It's cool.

What's on: Thursday

2007-07-26T01:56:00.000-04:00

No time for all the stuff I'd like to write about... but here's tonight's lineup...

If you're not watching BURN NOTICE (USA/10 p.m.) you probably should be. It's much more entertaining than its ads initially sold it as.

PBS premieres a documentary, GET UP STAND UP: THE STORY OF POP AND PROTEST (8 p.m.). Hosted by Chuck D, it documents the affect pop music has had on social change.

Plus, two Sci-Fi Channel premieres: Season 2 of WHO WANTS TO BE A SUPERHERO (9 p.m.) and MIND CONTROL WITH DERREN BROWN (10 p.m.). Brown's a mentalist who in the first episode will experiment with his powers over a PA system in a shopping mall.

BIG BROTHER 8 (CBS/8 p.m.) will oust a third houseguest... probably Kail.

Also new: Don't Forget the Lyrics and So You Think You Can Dance on Fox; First 48 and Detroit Swat on A&E; TNA Impact on Spike; Mad Men on A&E.

What's on: Wednesday

2007-07-25T13:04:00.000-04:00

If you're ready to watch a good show turn bad, don't miss LAST COMIC STANDING (NBC/9 p.m.). Passed the fun opening audition rounds, they put some really bad comics through to the finals last week and left some really funny people sitting in the back. It seemed to me they just wanted to have people from every demographic on the series at the expense of good comedy. Four of the chosen aren't even funny.

ABC's picking the NEXT BEST THING (8 p.m.) tonight.

Also new: So You Think You Can Dance and Don't Forget the Lyrics on Fox; American Inventor on ABC; Cash Cab on Discovery; Top Chef reunion on Bravo; two episodes of Tyler Perry's House of Payne on TBS; and two episodes of WWE MSG Classics on MSG.

Damages review

2007-07-25T01:38:00.000-04:00

Few things (in the realm of television) make me happier than a new show on FX. So, of course, finally having time to sit down and review a show, I picked last night's premiere of Damages (yes I know I owe you an On the Lot wrap and a Saving Grace review, but I think I picked wisely). This isn't an action story. It's not comedy. It's a straight-faced, mentor-student drama on the surface. It's slow and brooding and expects the viewer to be ready for a long haul. It's dark. Really dark.

At the center is the mysteriously bloody girl who exits the elevator in the opening scene. Turns out she's a lawyer, seeking work with Glenn Close's hard-nosed hump-busting high-stakes litigator Patti Hughes straight out of law school. Hughes is working on a case against Ted Danson's Frobisher, who's been accused of duping his employees into buying tons of stock in his company then dumping all of his shares. Frobisher's getting close to getting the employees to take a settlement. Hughes NOT happy.

Danson's really good in this non-comedic villain role; and of course Close is, despite a few cliches, the shining star. But she's got to have some support or the show would really be lost. The rest of the supporting cast falls in step.

As it gets through some base getting-to-know-the-characters stuff, the show has some serious potential. It's pretty to look at and it's not really about what you think it's about. I think that darkness is going to grow and set the show off from both its single-character driven brethren and its serial-storyline brethren as well.

Hughes comes off as House in that she's a revered and respected member of her profession who's willing to do anything to get the job done. But in its opening throes, this show is much more serious. I get the feeling by the end of the season you'll feel more like you've just watched something like 24 than House.

Worth your time. Give the pilot episode a shot.

What's on: Tuesday

2007-07-24T14:02:00.000-04:00

Veto competition on BIG BROTHER 8 (CBS/9 p.m.) tonight. Kail and Jen are up for eviction but I think anyone would be silly to use the veto if they won it... most of the houseguests would be happy to see either go I think.

More importantly, DAMAGES (FX/10 p.m.) premieres tonight. Glenn Close's first series is being billed as a legal thriller. As a corporate litigator, she's working to bring down Ted Danson. I'll have reviews of this and Saving Grace tonight or tomorrow.

Also new: America's Got Talent and Singing Bee on NBC; On the Lot on Fox; Just for Laughs and Shaq's Big Challenge on ABC; Wide Angle and POV on PBS; Costas Now on HBO; Kathy Griffin on Bravo; Eureka and ECW on Sci-Fi; The Bronx is Burning on ESPN.

Pirate run through

2007-07-24T13:43:00.000-04:00

From Hollywood Reporter:

LOS ANGELES -- CBS has scuttled Pirate Master, a low-rated reality series from Survivor producer Mark Burnett.
The show, in which 16 contestants searched for buried treasure, has struggled since its May 31 premiere, falling short of time-slot leader Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader? on Fox. It marks the second flop for Burnett this summer, with his Fox series On the Lot also suffering in the ratings.

Not really a surprise. But, seriously, replaced by reruns seems a lame move to me. I want NEW content. Not something I saw 7 months ago. NEW CONTENT NETWORKS! HEED ME!

In the Right place

2007-07-24T13:35:00.000-04:00

Bob Barker's replacement has been named! From AP (via Yahoo):

NEW YORK -- Genial comic Drew Carey was tapped Monday to replace silver-haired legend Bob Barker on the CBS daytime game show The Price is Right. The deal was set Monday afternoon shortly before a taping of CBS' Late Show with David Letterman, where he confirmed it.

"I realize what a big responsibility this is," he said. "It's only a game show, but it's the longest-running game show in American television and I plan to keep it that way."

The selection attracted more attention than usual for a daytime show because of the prospect of replacing Barker, 83. Barker retired after 35 years in the job last month following taping of his 6,586th episode.

Not a bad pick. I've never hated Drew Carey at all... except for that whole Whose Line thing...

Full story here.

Premiere updates

2007-07-23T14:27:00.000-04:00

Updated the premiere watch section on the sidebar with the schedues for Fox, NBC, CBS and CW. I'll update you when the ABC list is available...

What's on: Monday

2007-07-23T12:22:00.000-04:00

TNT tacks another show onto its original-series lineup. SAVING GRACE (10 p.m.), starring Holly Hunter as a cop who has a big ol' spiritual awakening. It joins the already popular Monday night lineup of HEARTLAND (8 p.m.) and THE CLOSER (9 p.m.).

If you can stomach it, ABC has a two-hour wrap of the CMA MUSIC FESTIVAL (9 p.m.).

Also new: Age of Love and Dateline on NBC; 5th Grader and Hell's Kitchen on Fox; Big Love on HBO; WWE Raw on USA; Kyle XY and Greek on ABC Family.

What's on: Sunday

2007-07-22T16:55:00.000-04:00

New tonight: Big Brother 8 on CBS; Dateline NBC; John from Cincinnati, Entourage and Flight of the Conchords on HBO; Side Order of Life, State of Mind and Army Wives on Lifetime; 4400 and Dead Zone on USA; debut of Hogan Knows Best, Rock of Love and Scott Baio is 45 and Single on VH1.

What's on: Friday

2007-07-20T13:49:00.000-04:00

New tonight: Standoff on Fox; the premiere of the Jimmy Kimmel-hosted game show Set for Life on ABC; Smackdown on CW; Monk and Psych on USA; Best Week Ever on VH1; Dr. Who and Painkiller Jane on Sci-fi; The Soup on E.

Jericho catchup starts at 9 p.m. on CBS. Watch it. It's cool.

Looks like Jerry gained a little weight...

2007-07-19T15:03:00.000-04:00

Rescue Me SPOILERS BELOW... yeah... not like much really went on this week. It's more of what you'd call a transitional episode, I think. Lots of new thoughts, brief touches on most of the old stuff. Nothing especially special.

The biggest point of discussion is the continuing deterioration of Tommy's psyche. As if his personal relationship with Janet isn't bad enough, he's having trouble trusting her with the baby... with good reason, apparently, since she ends up leaving the kid with the 12-year-old while she goes out to get a refill. And with the surface emasculation issues he's got, his biggest problem is his inability to step up and be the one in control of his life that's really his major issue. His prospective girlfriend (the firefighter) pointed it out directly to him, but he was too busy being humiliated by the blow-off to notice she was right.

Don't get me wrong, getting benched at the hockey game, participating in ANOTHER size discussion (this time with the aging new chief) and trampled on by a sweetie who you've just blown it with AGAIN can really put a damper on any man-time you may have going on in your own head. But, jeez, of course it's not going to work out if you're just pointing out, "oh, now I'm ready because my wife and I are broken up again." And then you're still wishy-washy. It's this inability to take, or hold onto, control -- which is because he's overworried about a ton of unimportant stuff -- that's going to screw things up even more. Jan's going to kill herself or something. Then Sheila can move in and get the baby like she wants (nice to see her back on the insanity pills she's been ignoring recently).

The show gave a little more insight into Tommy's problems this week, too, with the shadowy figure (who'll turn out to be himself) appearing in response to Tommy's statement, "I'm back." Tommy's in love with himself more than anything.

In brief:
-- I give this show credit for tackling stuff that tends to be more controversial or taboo for a lot of other shows (comedically a lot of the time, but also in a very real view) -- be it alcoholism, depression or petty free speech issues like the pictures/religious paraphernalia in the lockers.
-- Teddy's REALLY become a useless character. What could have been a hilarious two-episode arc of him in rehab turned out to be two scenes. The whole thing was a waste of time.
-- Quote me. Maggie's going to change her mind about Shawn (who put out a really good performance this week).
--This show is always fun to watch -- it's always show beautifully gritty and cut quite intelligently. I have to stop taking notes for this column and pay more attention...

Like I said, there wasn't much going on overall. Franco's engaged; Lou, still hilarious, calls for a timeout with his post-convent girlfriend... OH! Yeah, that urn in the firehouse isn't going to continue to be a problem or anything... nah. And it's not going to weigh on Tommy at all seeing him all the time as things seem to get tougher and more bleak.

What's on: Thursday

2007-07-19T13:30:00.000-04:00

BIG BROTHER 8 (CBS/8 p.m.) will toss its second house guest tonight -- Joe or Dick.

Also new: 5th Grader and Don't Forget the Lyrics on Fox; First 48 and Detroit Swat on A&E; Burn Notice on USA; World Series of Pop Culture on VH1; TNA Impact on Spike; Hey Paula on Bravo.

I'll go over last night's Rescue Me after work tonight...

Gya, gya, gya...

2007-07-19T12:45:00.000-04:00

It's Emmy time! Interesting point I'd like to make first... why is it that the television awards are the least interesting awards show on television? As you ponder that, I'll drop you the list of the big nominations (and some of my patented, militant opinion).

Lead Actor In A Comedy Series: Ricky Gervais as Andy Millman, Extras, HBO; Tony Shalhoub as Adrian Monk, Monk, USA; Steve Carell as Michael Scott, The Office, NBC; Alec Baldwin as Jack Donaghy, 30 Rock, NBC; Charlie Sheen as Charlie Harper, Two And A Half Men, CBS.

Lead Actor In A Drama Series: James Spader as Alan Shore, Boston Legal, ABC; Hugh Laurie as Dr. Gregory House, House, Fox; Denis Leary as Tommy Gavin, Rescue Me, FX; James Gandolfini as Tony Soprano, The Sopranos, HBO; Kiefer Sutherland as Jack Bauer, 24, Fox.

(Two tough categories, but no one's carried a show like Baldwin or been as real and human as Leary.)

Lead Actor In A Miniseries Or A Movie: Robert Duvall as Prentice "Print" Ritter, Broken Trail, AMC; Tom Selleck as Jesse Stone, Jesse Stone: Sea Change, CBS; Jim Broadbent as Lord Longford, Longford, HBO; William H. Macy as Clyde Umney & Sam Landry, Nightmares & Dreamscapes: From The Stories Of Stephen King, Umney's Last Case, TNT; Matthew Perry as Ron Clark, The Ron Clark Story, TNT.

Lead Actress In A Comedy Series: Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo, Desperate Housewives, ABC; Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Christine Campbell, The New Adventures Of Old Christine, CBS; Tina Fey as Liz Lemon, 30 Rock, NBC; America Ferrera as Betty Suarez, Ugly Betty, ABC; Mary-Louise Parker as Nancy Botwin, Weeds, Showtime.

Lead Actress In A Drama Series: Sally Field as Nora Walker, Brothers & Sisters, ABC; Kyra Sedgwick as Dep. Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson, The Closer, Slippin', TNT; Mariska Hargitay as Detective Olivia Benson, Law & Order: SVU, NBC; Patricia Arquette as Allison Dubois, Medium, NBC; Minnie Driver as Dahlia Malloy, The Riches, FX; Edie Falco as Carmela Soprano, The Sopranos, HBO.

(I like Minnie Driver here, but she's among some popular competition.)

Lead Actress In A Miniseries Or A Movie: Queen Latifah as Ana, Life Support, HBO; Helen Mirren as Jane Tennison, Prime Suspect: The Final Act (Masterpiece Theatre), PBS; Mary-Louise Parker as Zenia Arden, The Robber Bride, Oxygen; Debra Messing as Molly Kagan, The Starter Wife, USA; Gena Rowlands as Melissa Eisenbloom, What If God Were The Sun, Lifetime.

Supporting Actor In A Comedy Series: Kevin Dillon as Johnny Drama, Entourage, HBO; Jeremy Piven as Ari Gold, Entourage, HBO; Neil Patrick Harris as Barney Stinson, How I Met Your Mother, CBS; Rainn Wilson as Dwight Schrute, The Office, NBC; Jon Cryer as Alan Harper, Two And A Half Men, CBS.

(Harris is pretty freakin' good. So's Wilson. Won't help, though. Piven's got the best character on TV.)

Supporting Actor In A Drama Series: William Shatner as Denny Crane, Boston Legal, ABC; T.R. Knight as George, Grey's Anatomy, ABC; Masi Oka as Hiro Nakamura, Heroes, NBC; Michael Emerson as Ben, Lost, ABC; Terry O'Quinn as John Locke, Lost, ABC; Michael Imperioli as Christopher Moltisanti, The Sopranos, HBO.

(Emerson's Ben is ridiculously creepy good.)

Supporting Actress In A Comedy Series: Jaime Pressly as Joy Turner, My Name Is Earl, NBC; Jenna Fischer as Pam Beesly, The Office, NBC; Holland Taylor as Evelyn Harper, Two And A Half Men, CBS; Conchata Ferrell as Berta, Two And A Half Men, CBS; Vanessa Williams as Wilhelmina Slater, Ugly Betty, ABC; Elizabeth Perkins as Celia Hodes, Weeds, Showtime.

Supporting Actress In A Drama Series: Rachel Griffiths as Sarah Whedon, Brothers & Sisters, ABC; Katherine Heigl as Isobel "Izzie" Stevens, Grey's Anatomy, ABC; Chandra Wilson as Dr. Bailey, Grey's Anatomy, ABC; Sandra Oh as Cristina Yang, Grey's Anatomy, ABC; Aida Turturro as Janice Soprano, The Sopranos, HBO; Lorraine Bracco as Dr. Jennifer Melfi, The Sopranos, HBO.

Comedy Series: Entourage, HBO; The Office, NBC; 30 Rock, NBC; Two And A Half Men, CBS; Ugly Betty, ABC.

(More like Two and a Half YECHs. Can Scrubs get ANY love? How about Always Sunny?)

Drama Series: Boston Legal, ABC; Grey's Anatomy, ABC; Heroes, NBC; House, Fox; The Sopranos, HBO.

(No Lost? Rescue Me? C'mon people.)

Miniseries: Broken Trail, AMC; Prime Suspect: The Final Act (Masterpiece Theatre), PBS; The Starter Wife, USA.

Made For Television Movie: Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee, HBO; Inside The Twin Towers, Discovery Channel; Longford, HBO; The Ron Clark Story, TNT; Why I Wore Lipstick To My Mastectomy, Lifetime.

Variety, Music Or Comedy Series: The Colbert Report, Comedy Central; The Daily Show With Jon Stewart, Comedy Central; Late Night With Conan O'Brien, NBC; Late Show With David Letterman, CBS; Real Time With Bill Maher, HBO.

Reality Program: Antiques Roadshow, PBS; Dog Whisperer With Cesar Millan, National Geographic; Extreme Makeover Home Edition, ABC; Kathy Griffin: My Life On The D-List, Bravo; Penn & Teller: Bullshit!, Showtime.

Reality-Competition Program: The Amazing Race, CBS; American Idol, Fox; Dancing With The Stars, ABC; Project Runway, Bravo; Top Chef, Bravo.

(That any of the shows in these last two categories should get an award for anything makes me nauseous).

More on the categories not mentioned here and some deeper looks at the big'uns later this weekend.

What's on: Wednesday

2007-07-18T14:38:00.000-04:00

The semifinals begin on LAST COMIC STANDING (NBC/9 p.m.). The show's been pretty good so far this year, but now we see what kind of talent we'll be following into the next couple months.

It's followed by DATELINE NBC (10 p.m.), which stakes out a home just two towns away from me in Lavallette, N.J., for its To Catch a Predator series.

Also new: So You Think You Can Dance and Don't Forget the Lyrics on Fox; Next Best Thing, American Inventor and Traveler on ABC; Really Big Things on Discovery; Rescue Me on FX; Top Chef on Bravo; Ghost Hunters and Destination Truth on Sci-Fi; two episodes of Tyler Perry's House of Payne on TBS.

My alotted time

2007-07-18T13:05:00.000-04:00

Ha! See how I did that? It's like it's a new joke again. It's action film week On the Lot. I'm excited, though I'm not sure anyone else in the TV watching world is. And seeing as how only two people have answered my poll on the right (--->), it seems I'm sitting here discussing these movies with myself. That Antwan Fuqua is watching them with me makes me feel a little better at least.

On the bright side, I called this week's oustings of Hillary (FINALLY) and Shalini.

Key Witness (Sam): This is very different content for this show. Witness caught by bounty hunter then found by bad guys. Terrible dialogue and nothing really outwardly special in his style, but just the right amount of quick cuts and goofiness to make it reasonably entertaining.

Sweet (Jason): Forgotten anniversary cliche... but I'm a big fan of cross concept stories. An action film with a goofy romantic-comedy story, though I think the comedy got pushed a little bit too hard and the props/costumes/etc were terrible. He's getting better every week as a filmmaker though.

Zero 2 Sixty (Andrew): Car salesman trapped in car with cop for chase. It's the type of flick that would be made in full-length format starring Jimmy Fallon to the horror of well-heeled film fans everywhere. In short form, it's OK, but I expect much more from this guy. The comedy was weak and I wasn't very much impressed with the acting, but it was really well shot.

The Losers (Kenny): I was really starting to like this guy after last week. Then he put THIS together. Dad competes in skateboarding downhill for son with busted ankle. The dialogue and the acting and the writing and the story were all horrific. Especially the dialogue.

Catch (Mateen): Best story of the night... good Samaritan chasing pickpocket and getting bamboozled. It may be his best yet. Well shot and better characters than any others tonight.

I'm thinking Kenny and Andrew may be the victims this week, though Andrew's better than his presentation showed this time around. Reader... comment?

Full House

2007-07-18T01:56:00.001-04:00

Hey, sorry I missed the what's on today... busy day... but here's some news for you. From Hollywood Reporter/Reuters:

LOS ANGELES -- Olivia Wilde, Kal Penn, Peter Jacobson and Anne Dudek have landed recurring roles on Fox's hit medical drama House.

The four are expected to play characters who will be brought in after the resignations of House's (Hugh Laurie) underlings Foreman (Omar Epps) and Cameron (Jennifer Morrison) and the firing of Chase (Jesse Spencer).

Full story here.

Either the kids are really leaving the show, or these will be the temporary replacements until House finally makes up with his team. Either way, well played Fox.

Poll added

2007-07-17T14:57:00.000-04:00

My sidebar has expanded to include polls, which I'm considering using in a discussion of the upcoming fall shows... please answer this week's poll so I can get an idea of how excited ya'll are about my small corner of the Web.

If you do so, I promise to never use the term "ya'll" again.

Finally, time for some tunes...

2007-07-16T19:34:00.000-04:00

Whether or not it was a coincidence (it probably wasn't), both NBC and Fox have brand new sing-that-song-correctly game shows for the summer season.

After about a week or so, I finally found an hour to put in to check out these two shows -- Fox's Don't Forget the Lyrics and NBC's The Singing Bee -- and see which is the more useful of the two useless karaoke game shows.

I'll get my thesis out of the way now: Considering NBC announced Bee for the fall, Fox put together Lyrics for the summer and NBC bumped Bee up, Lyrics seems to be the less-lame (though, obviously more derivative) of the two shows.

Fox basically put together a Millionaire ripoff that feeds on the same tension as that savior of game show TV and the current reigning champ, Deal or No Deal. Contestants, led and coached by the always-too-excited and popular-with-the-Millionaire-crowd Wayne Brady (of Whose Line fame). He even sings along when contestants check their answers. The contestants choose from a pool of categories, then from the two songs within, and work their way up a prize-money ladder to the million-dollar tune. They've got three "backups" (life lines), including in-studio assistants. The biggest problem is the contestants get to amend their original performance if they can't get it the first time. A contestant's appearance can drag on over a few shows and the action is pretty slow moving.

That said, it's a bazillion times more entertaining than the Joey Fatone-helmed Singing Bee on NBC. Not that that's saying much. Flanked by a band (which is more prominent, but less talented than the Lyrics crew) and a quartet of dancers, Fatone picks six players out of the audience and then makes them come up with fairly simple lyrics in the first round (which four contestants survive). They whittle them down to two, and then a winner, who competes for $50,000. The songs here are ridiculously simple (someone had to figure out what comes after "I wanna rock and roll all night") and the biggest problem is small embellishments (like soulfully plugging the word "well" before a lyric) can get you a buzzer. It's way over the top and doesn't even follow simple spelling bee rules, which might make it more useful.

Overall, you probably shouldn't be wasting your time with either show. But Lyrics has a bit more to it and presents an actual challenge, whereas Bee is like something you'd see on Telemundo at 4:30 a.m.

Minds blowing

2007-07-16T18:06:00.000-04:00

From E! Online:

Mandy Patinkin is not only out of sight on the fall TV season, he's completely out of Minds.

Days after news broke that the Criminal Minds star was MIA from the third-season premiere's table read, Patinkin and producers have announced that the Emmy-winning actor has left the series at his request.

"Due to creative differences, Mandy has asked not to return to Criminal Minds this season," the actor's publicist said in a statement. "Mandy would like to thank the studios and network for releasing him from the series and he wishes the cast and crew continued success in all of their endeavors and looks forward to continuing to work with the Disney and CBS companies in other capacities in the future."

Full story here.

It's too bad that no one will have any need to watch this show anymore... but I'm curious to see where they take it.

What's on: Monday

2007-07-16T12:03:00.001-04:00

If you like intelligent entertainment, VICTORIA BECKHAM: COMING TO AMERICA (NBC/8 p.m.) may not be for you. It follows the former pop star as she and soccer star David Beckham settle in to L.A. But if you're normally watching a lot of E! or MTV, go for it.

Also new: Age of Love on NBC; Hell's Kitchen on Fox; Extreme Makeover on ABC; Big Love on HBO; The Closer and Heartland on TNT; Kyle XY and Greek on ABC Family.

Talk about jumping the shark...

2007-07-16T11:21:00.000-04:00

From Hollywood Reporter:

CBS' Criminal Minds could return for a third season without Mandy Patinkin. The star didn't show up for the table read of the ABC Studios/CBS Paramount-produced drama's table read this week, which first was reported by E!

Sources said that the episode had been written featuring few scenes with Patinkin, an indication that the show is preparing for a possible future without him.

Full story here.

If you want to see a show come to a crashing halt, watch when Mandy leaves. As good as this procedural is, he's really the crux... This would just be another reason for me to dislike CBS.

One extra Extras

2007-07-16T11:16:00.000-04:00

From Zap2it:

Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant are sticking to their plan of not filming a third season of Extras. But the show isn't quite finished either.

The award-winning duo will close out the story of background actor-turned-sitcom star Andy Millman (Gervais) with a one-hour Extras special, HBO announced Thursday at the Television Critics Association's summer press tour. Gervais and Merchant did something similar with the original version of The Office, finishing off two seasons with a one-shot special (which earned an Emmy nomination for writing in 2005).

Full story here.

Nothing unexpected. I would have been disappointed if they didn't have a special, actually. But I don't think the story needed it especially.

What's on: Sunday

2007-07-15T19:20:00.001-04:00

New tonight: Big Brother on CBS; John from Cincinnati, Entourage and Flight of the Conchords on HBO; American Body Shop on Comedy Central; premieres on Side Order of Life and State of Mind along with a new Army Wives on Lifetime; 4400 and Dead Zone on USA; debuts of Rock of Love and Scott Baio is 45 and Single on VH1.

What's on: Friday

2007-07-13T04:20:00.001-04:00

I'm excited. Not only do I get a new Rescue Me every week, but back tonight is PSYCH (USA/10 p.m.). I can't say enough good stuff about this well acted, cleverly written show. It follows a brand new MONK (9 p.m.). Both will be around for a couple months for the midsummer haves of their seasons.

MSG network has a live performance from OAR (8 p.m.) as part of its concert series. Rock. Seriously.

Also new: Smackdown on CW; Standoff on Fox; 20/20 on ABC; Best Week Ever on VH1; Dr. Who and Painkiller Jane on Sci-fi; The Soup on E.

Also... it's not new, but your weekly Jericho catchup is on from 8 to 10 p.m.

What's on: Thursday

2007-07-12T12:52:00.002-04:00

BIG BROTHER 8 (CBS/8 p.m.) will toss its first house guest tonight... more than likely it'll be the cutesy Carol, who's gotten nearly no camera time compared with her "nemesis," the annoyingly dimwitted Jessica.

Also new: 5th Grader and Don't Forget the Lyrics on Fox; Burn Notice on USA; World Series of Pop Culture on VH1; TNA Impact on Spike; Hey Paula on Bravo.

My mom will be happy

2007-07-12T12:42:00.000-04:00

From Hollywood Reporter (via Yahoo):

LOS ANGELES - Lifetime Television has green-lighted a second season of its hit drama Army Wives. The network has ordered 13 episodes of the series for Season 2, which will begin in the spring.

Wives has become a breakout hit under Lifetime Networks entertainment president Susanne Daniels, who joined the network in September 2005. It ranks as the highest-rated series in Lifetime's 23-year history, averaging 3.6 million total viewers at 10 p.m. Sundays.

The show -- which debuted June 3 to 3.5 million viewers, the most ever for a Lifetime series premiere -- also stands as the top new cable drama of the year among the female demographic age groups of 18-34, 18-49 and 25-54.

Full story here.

Jamedryl

2007-07-12T03:06:00.000-04:00

Rescue Me SPOILERS BELOW

I'm starting to realize how naive and nerdy it is of me to consider Lost to be my favorite show. It's like when I was a kid and though Labyrinth was the best movie ever. Sure, a Bowie-scored Muppet flick is cool (despite his tight purple pants), but there needs to be a more worldly view taken when making such an assertion.

Not that Lost isn't among the best shows ever produced for television, it's just a narrowed, overly cynical view for me to take, I think. Especially considering that I purport to be somewhat of a professional, part-time TV journalist. I'll credit this week's Rescue Me with putting me in this frame of mind. This show has gotten progressively better on a weekly basis since starting in July 2004 and deserves just as high a classification.

Specifically, I want to point out the squad's incident in the burning building -- an everyday occurrence for them, I'm sure, complete with flames, rescues, a baby's delivery, losing track of a team member and getting lost in a NYC building. This is the only show that could make a comedy routine out of that.

Anyway... previously on Rescue Me THE CHIEF KILLED HIMSELF (yes, killed himself, those friends of mine who were heard spouting the query "you think he's dead?"). You would think that's all you'd really have to know coming into this week, but it turns out Jerry gets a more unceremonious sendoff. I read somewhere that the actor who plays the chief, Jack McGee, blames a falling out with Denis Leary for this. I don't necessarily buy into that, and Leary denies it. But, either way, the chief was beaten on every level and I tend to agree with Lou, who gave the guy respect for going out on his terms while the younger guys deemed him a coward.

(Which leads in to a brilliantly performed and written tirade from Tommy, who doesn't get to do the serious stuff with that sort of situation very often. "He used up all the goddamn brave he had" may be among the best lines I've ever heard spoken on television.)

Sadly, instead of focusing on Jerry, this episode is all about Tommy's emasculation. It's common fare for one of the three women in his family to walk all over him, with little in the way of argument (letting his eldest blackmail him into buying furniture, letting his younger daughter draw his attention when she know's he's annoyed about the other one, letting his ex(ish)-wife hold onto him at arms length until SHE'S ready to make time for him). Sheila, too, to just shove her way into the apartment is nothing out of the ordinary.

Then there's the firefighter who saved his life... by the time he gets to her he's a stuttering, scared mess of a man who's unable to unclench and put together a full, truthful sentence. By the time he goes chasing her (the Tommy/Janet do-over was obviously a bad idea) she'll want nothing to do with him... she'll probably be with the goofus Sheila's dating right now. The question now is why is Tommy such a wuss... and now he HAS to find out the answer, since it's starting to physically manifest.

This, again, is a theme in Leary's work. Who knows why... maybe he enjoys exploring it. It's certainly great comedic fodder. But hopefully we're getting to a place where he actually gets down to the bottom of it. (Either that or, early prediction, he'll get news that he has cancer or something and blame his lack of performance on that... and use it to make everyone else feel guilty.)

He's still a romantic, though. He can sit and pontificate about the joys of marriage to Franco and tell him to "pull the trigger" without any hesitation (that's going to be a great exchange next week when Tommy tells Franco he was out of his mind). He obviously wanted the Janet thing really bad and will either be crushed or extra crotchety when next week's edition comes around.

Side notes:
-- Lou will consistently remain my favorite character -- his delivery both comedically and dramatically are impeccable, though it's nice to have Adam Ferrara on full-time duty.
-- Jerry's death being fixed as a heart attack so his son can pick up the benefits was a nice touch, though I'm worried it may come back to haunt Tommy now that his most recent court battle is over.
-- Jamedryl = hilarious.
-- More proof of this show's brilliance:

What's on: Wednesday

2007-07-11T14:14:00.001-04:00

RESCUE ME (FX/10 p.m.) is back after a long week off for those of us looking to actually enjoy television. I nearly started crying at one point when all my TiVo had for me to choose from was American Body Shop (review still grudgingly to come) three Las Vegas reruns and Big Brother.

Fox's DON'T FORGET THE LYRICS (9:30 p.m.) is your new lyrically based game show du jour.

More sports Matt? Seriously? Yeah, that's right. HBO's got a new documentary: BROOKLYN DODGERS: THE GHOSTS OF FLATBUSH (8 p.m.).

Singing Bee, America's Got Talent and Last Comic Standing on NBC; So You Think You Can Dance on Fox; Next Best Thing, American Inventor and Traveler on ABC; Cash Cab premieres on Discovery; Top Chef on Bravo; Ghost Hunters and Destination Truth on Sci-Fi; two episodes of Tyler Perry's House of Payne on TBS; WWE MSG Classics on MSG.

Jericho report

2007-07-11T13:32:00.000-04:00

From E! Online (via Yahoo):

Airing in the 9 p.m. Friday hour, Jericho averaged 4.6 million viewers, settling for a 51st-place finish in the holiday-weakened week, per the latest Nielsen Media Research rankings.

On the upside for Jericho fans, their beloved did in the summer what it couldn't do in the regular season: Beat the competition. With the show's powerhouse nemeses, Dancing with the Stars and American Idol, on vacation, Jericho took care of business against a Las Vegas rerun on NBC (72nd place, 3.6 million), a leftover episode of the Fox castoff, Standoff (89th place, 3 million) and a slightly used Kyle XY (94th place, 2.6 million), ABC's recycled ABC Family Channel summer series.

And while a win is a win is a win, Jericho was CBS' weakest link on the night. Ghost Whisperer (40th place, 5.1 million) aired before Jericho; Numb3rs (25th place, 5.9 million) aired after it—both scored more viewers.

Full story here.

First of all, you can't count on ratings on a Friday night for anything and second of all, it's summer. People will catch up on DVD if anything.

Park

2007-07-11T13:21:00.000-04:00

This from About.com:

The Drive saga continues. The original plan was for Fox to air the two remaining episodes of Drive on July 4, but several weeks ago they changed the air date to July 13. However, Fox has made more changes to the schedule, which included dumping those two unaired episodes of Drive altogether.

Oh well. Better they not tease loyal viewers anyway. Not like the race would've ended in those two episodes.

Losing aLot

2007-07-10T20:01:00.000-04:00

Well, after a text this morning from a friend of mine, I believe I'm the ONLY person still watching On the Lot. They're not even doing live kick-off shows. They're cramming the show into an hour each week and bouncing it around all over the schedule.

Now they're booting two directors each week over the next two weeks. They really want to finish this show up. Fox, if you hadn't been so wishy washy about it at the beginning, people would have caught on. But you kept changing the game. Tsk.

Considering the sheer creepiness of her flick and the real ballsy move by Mateen, I'm a little surprised Shira-Lee went home. Oh well.

Time Upon a Once (Zach): Interesting concept, but that was just WEIRD. There was nearly no story and I'm kinda disappointed.

The Legend of Donkey-tail Willy (Hillary): She's the worst contestant still on the show. At least she didn't disappoint. Sheez, that was terrible. Probably the worst thing I've ever seen on film. I honestly didn't see two worlds collide, either. Why can't directors follow directions.

Spaghetti (Will): Complete other side of the coin. Best director in the competition and probably among his best flicks yet. It looked REALLY good, too. And he followed directions.

(Make Gary Marshall stop trying to be funny. Someone. Please.)

First Sight (Shalini): Um. Yeah. Trying too hard. Sorry. I know she wasn't trying to be entertaining. But still.

Worldly Possession (Adam): Silly, but among the best this week. He'll be fine

Bye bye to Shalini and Hillary if America knows what's good for it. You know. All 12 voters.

What's on: Tuesday

2007-07-10T16:37:00.000-04:00

NBC beats Fox to the hook tonight, being the first to debut its sing-the-right-lyrics game show: SINGING BEE (9:30 p.m.) hosted by Joey Fatone. Fox's Don't Forget the Lyrics premieres tomorrow.

CBS hopes a BIG BROTHER 8 ousting (9 p.m.) as a lead in will help PIRATE MASTER (10 p.m.), which I happen to be enjoying thoroughly. Both decent shows as far as reality competitions go.

And, in an unprecedented occasion where I will put up a sports presentation two days in a row, the MLB ALL-STAR GAME (Fox/8 p.m.) comes to you from San Francisco this year... so Barry Bonds doesn't get booed for sullying the sport every time he walks on the field. Not that it's his fault alone... different discussion... sorry.

Also new: America's Got Talent on NBC; Shaq's Big Challenge on ABC; Wide Angle and POV (which will discuss the Newark riots) on PBS; Miami Ink on TLC; Dirty Jobs and the debut of Build it Bigger on Discovery; Eureka's season premiere and ECW on Sci-Fi; Kathy Griffin on Bravo.

ESPN loses another of its old guard...

2007-07-09T23:00:00.000-04:00

From AP:

Dan Patrick is leaving ESPN after 18 years, insisting there is no acrimony but saying he was beginning to take his job for granted.

The former SportsCenter anchor announced his decision on his radio show Monday and said his final show will be Aug. 17. Patrick said he hoped to continue working in radio but wasn't sure if he would do any more television.

"It's been home, but I think I was starting to take it for granted, and I did not want to do that," Patrick said on the air. "I did not think that was fair to these great people." Patrick said ESPN executives tried to talk him out of his decision.

He originally planned to make the announcement last week, but they asked him to reconsider.

"If there was animosity, I wouldn't be doing radio shows after this one today," he said.

Full story here.

I haven't paid as much attention to the network since realizing I don't really care that much about sports, but he's still one of the most recognizable faces/voices the network will ever have, and he and Olberman really made SportsCenter entertaining for a while there.

What's on: Monday

2007-07-09T17:19:00.000-04:00

ABC Family, a Disney company that touts itself as a "family" station... right in it's own name... has prepared a college-based, fraternity comedy. GREEK (9 and 10 p.m.) premieres tonight. I'm sure it's good, wholesome entertainment. Meanwhile Ellen couldn't say she was gay on ABC. Gimme a break.

Probably more interesting, ESPN -- not known for its original content being anything special -- premieres an 8-part miniseries: THE BRONX IS BURNING (10 p.m.) based on the Yankees' 1977 season.

New tonight: On the Lot and Hell's Kitchen on Fox; Age of Love on NBC; Extreme Makeover on ABC; Big Love on HBO; Monday Night Raw on USA; The Closer and Heartland on TNT; World Series of Pop Culture on VH1; Kyle XY on ABC Family.

Wanna watch a talk show? The Decemberists are on Leno...

What's on: Sunday

2007-07-08T17:46:00.000-04:00

It's not much to look at tonight: American Body Shop premiers on Comedy Central; Big Brother 8 on CBS; John from Cincinnati, Flight of the Conchords and Entourage on HBO; Army Wives on Lifetime; 4400 and Dead Zone on USA.

Nine, Knights get some play

2007-07-08T17:19:00.000-04:00

From Zap2it:

Viewers will finally get a chance to see how The Nine ends -- if not necessarily how it ends -- starting next month.

ABC is bringing back the drama, one of the casualties of last season's serialized drama massacre, for a summer burnoff starting Aug. 1. It will return to the 10 p.m. Wednesday spot it previously occupied last fall.

The network will also bring back its comedy The Knights of Prosperity, at least for one week. The bulk of its episodes aired last winter, but one of the few remainders from its order, titled "Operation: Rent Money," is scheduled for Aug. 8.

Full story here.

Nine fans will be happy. If you're a Knights fan you probably watched all the remaining episodes online.

NBC, Trump make nice?

2007-07-08T17:14:00.000-04:00

From Reuters (via Yahoo):

NBC and producers of The Apprentice will bring Donald Trump's reality TV show back from the brink of cancellation for at least one more season, industry sources said Friday.

The sources told Reuters on condition of anonymity that NBC plans to announce a renewal at an annual summer presentation to television critics on July 16, about two months after the show had appeared on the verge of prime-time extinction.

There was no official word on a deal from NBC, the Trump organization or executive producer Mark Burnett, but all three parties have acknowledged in recent weeks that negotiations on a possible return of the show were continuing.

Full story here.

Curious call considering all the complaining the network had been doing over the show's ratings and the big blowup Trump feigned after NBC's upfronts left the show off the schedule. Also curious considering it's a cruddy show and NBC decided to bring it back over much more quality fare.

What's on: Friday

2007-07-06T13:59:00.000-04:00

It's not new stuff, but credible nonetheless... JERICHO (CBS/9 p.m.) had been canceled just a month ago. No longer. It's back in rerun form and will be back for real in the spring. Start catching up now, because it's a quality piece of television. Watch. WATCH!

Sci-fi's DOCTOR WHO (8 p.m.) is back for its third season with two episodes.

Also new: Standoff on Fox; Smackdown on CW; Painkiller Jane on Sci-fi.

Why do I watch Entourage?

2007-07-05T14:19:00.001-04:00

Here's my problem. when you turn on HBO to watch television, you expect a higher class of show. Comedically, Entourage IS that higher class of show. It's still very entertaining despite what I'm about to say. But as far as the storylines go, I'm not sure the fans who're watching the show as loyally as I am realize the hornswaggle that's being played upon them.

As massively entertaining as the show is, and with all the little windows it purports to provide into the world of a budding mega star... it doesn't. There's no conflict. There's nothing that goes wrong for more than a half-hour's worth of television -- and that sort of watered down sitcom-writer thinking is not what HBO has promised me. The longest-running conflict, Vince's Mandy Moore obsession, lasted two episodes or so.

Case in point, last week's beginnings of conflict between Eric and Vince over their feelings about fictional would-be blockbuster Medellin, into which they've put all of their cash. Eric, in a fit of panic, takes every step he can think of to get the movie fixed and, supposedly, save Vince's career. He even goes groveling to Harvey Weinstein. Vince, who liked the flick, doesn't even care. He's off partying with Dennis Hopper.

Now, this could be the beginnings of a big split between the two. Vince dumps Eric as a manager and Eric goes on to run a studio in a perfectly Superman/Lex Luthor storyline that would be compelling and still have that basis for entertaining comedy that the show has a stranglehold on.

Turns out it's not. Everything's OK now, since the movie's been accepted into the Cannes film festival. Conflict resolved. Everything's OK for another week, until one of the kids forgets to do their homework and has to be at school in an hour. Wait... that's Full House.

Show me a scandal in the tabloids -- some intern on set claiming Vince did something to her. Show me one of the guys getting arrested for something. Show me the movie ACTUALLY bombing. Give me a reason to worry about your characters.

I don't care how great it is to be a successful star. Basing a fictional show on that merely puts it on the level of reality shows like Girls Next Door and Hey Paula. Why waste writers on something like that?

What's on: Thursday

2007-07-05T14:07:00.000-04:00

Voyeurs rejoice. While Real World has gotten way too ridiculous over the past 10 years, network TV doesn't have as much leeway when it comes to showing people living their lives -- the bigoted family values crews will come crying. So, instead of that extra little bit of nudity and drunkenness that you can count on seeing on MTV, you get goofy competitions and public voting. Welcome back, BIG BROTHER (CBS/8 p.m.).

If you missed last week's premiere, you shouldn't have. So watch BURN NOTICE (USA/10 p.m.).

Also new: Pirate Master on CBS; TNA Impact on Spike; Hey Paula on Bravo.

Quick trip to the Lot

2007-07-04T02:26:00.000-04:00

I'll keep this a little bit short.

Short-form horror is an intriguing concept for this killer competition. Apparently, I'm the only one enjoying it, but I really want to see what these guys can do when faced with this tougher task. There're some really good filmmakers on the docket this week, too. Kenny's up this week as well.

This week's ouster: Bull-crap decision booting David, America. Seriously. If I have to keep complaining about this stuff to you, I may just stop discussing this type of show... wait, that sounds like a good idea.

The Malibu Myth (Kenny): I'm thinking that at least we get this out of the way early. It was terribly written, but shot EXTREMELY well. Goofy ending hurt him, I think, but so much better than anything else he's done.

Anklebiters (Sam): Interesting tone (sort of felt like an episode of Nickelodeon's old Are You Afraid of the Dark?) and great atmosphere, but I think his worry about working with a puppet came true. I also agree with Eli Roth about the tag with the detective taking away.

Midnight Snack (Andrew): Funny and well shot. Not his best, though, which disappointed me. That I can't come up with much else makes me worry about him.

Eternal Waters (Jason): Wow. Holy crow, that was good. He had a brilliant story, different from the rest in that it was much more supernatural and had a real story behind it. He took a big step up in the competition.

Open House (Shira-Lee): The directors that are working out of their element seem to keep doing well. This was good -- not the best, but really good.

Side note: Eli Roth keeps referring to other films. It's perturbing.

Profile (Mateen): I don't have a problem with making a statement, but I don't know how to feel about this one. Until I realized it was all in his mind, I'd decided this isn't a horror movie, thereby making him this week's loser on principle. It ended up being much better than I expected considering the circumstances. I really like this guy. That doesn't mean it'll save him.

All good ones this week, I think. But what we're missing here is a longer look into the making of these short films... maybe make the groups smaller and the films/intros a bit longer. It would serve everyone a lot better.

Mateen will likely be the one to go, though I'd put in my vote for Sam. These are all good filmmakers, but his was maybe the worst movie.

What's on: Tuesday

2007-07-03T17:08:00.001-04:00

Seriously, I promise you'll have a full post from me sometime. Eventually. For now, here's your Tuesday....

If you're a film fan, watch ON THE LOT (Fox/8 p.m.). There are talented upcoming filmmakers here. And they're being ignored because it's summertime.

HBO's got a documentary special: COMA (9 p.m.) takes a look at the "explores the mysteries of the injured brain and its ability to heal" according to the network's synopsis. The show will follow four coma survivors over the course of a year.

Also new: Shaq's Big Challenge on ABC; Wide Angle and POV on PBS; Miami Ink on TLC; Dirty Jobs on Discovery; ECW on Sci-Fi.

What's on: Monday

2007-07-02T14:53:00.000-04:00

I get a day off tomorrow (after who remembers how long)! You might actually get a real post out of me. Until then, here's tonight's rundown... new tonight: Age of Love on NBC; Hell's Kitchen on Fox; Extreme Makeover on ABC; Big Love on HBO; The Closer and Heartland on TNT; WWE Raw on USA; Kyle XY on ABC Family.

What's on: Sunday

2007-07-01T14:08:00.002-04:00

Please pardon my scarcity recently. I'm going on my 12th straight day of work today. It's not pretty. I've barely looked at my TV in a week. If you do have time to spend on the couch tonight, there's not much to choose from.

Princess Di's sons have organized a charity concert in honor of their late mom's birthday. NBC will air the CONCERT FOR DIANA (8 p.m.), which includes appearances by Elton John, Duran Duran and Kanye West.

THE LOOP (FOX/7, 8:30 and 9:30 p.m.) wraps up its rushed second season with three new episodes, that will more than likely be this show's last flight.

Also new: John from Cincinnati, Entourage and Flight of the Conchords on HBO; Army Wives on Lifetime; 4400 and Dead Zone on USA.

What's on: Friday

2007-06-29T15:21:00.000-04:00

New tonight: Standoff on Fox; 20/20 on ABC; Smackdown on CW; Best Week Ever on VH1; The Soup and The Hum on E!; Painkiller Jane on Sci-Fi.

Quick reviews

2007-06-29T02:23:00.000-04:00

Couple of new shows to update you one... one I'm a little behind in reviewing, but you're over it, right?

HEARTLAND: TNT says it knows drama. This show is proof that at least it knows drama from 18 years ago. It looks and feels like a show my parents may have watched while I was being put to bed at 7:30 p.m. ... or maybe playing with my He-Man toys. Remington Steele-era stuff with GE sing-songily bringing good things to life for you.

It's a medical drama set in a transplant clinic, so it has "overdone" written all over it. And it does lay it on pretty heavy, but it's not a horrible piece of cable crud. It's biggest problem is likely that it's compartmentalized itself in a specific area with a small cast. The cast is strong though, despite the merely tolerable dialogue it's faced with.

If you're a medical drama fan or into really heart-tugging stories then this one's for you. IT doesn't take much thought, just a hope for an easy to follow story. If you're looking for excitement or suspense or even thoughtfulness, then move on. If I had a rating system, I'd give it a 2 out of 5.

BURN NOTICE: This is what you get when you try to infuse a spy show with the same cleverness as USA's big shows Monk and Psych. Lead (Jeffrey Donovan) isn't as strong as the guys in those other shows, and the show's obviously not that confident in itself, considering the amount of skin that crosses the screen in a given 10 minute period. But it's Miami and everyone walks around in a bathing suit 24/7, right?

Anyway, it's still entertaining and has some potential. It's a very different type of spy story. Mike can't leave Miami and he's doing odd jobs (solving a framing and stopping a kidnapping in the pilot) to make some cash so he can figure out why he's been blackballed by the government.

I'm going to give it a few more weeks. I have a bit of confidence that with some investment, it'll be a very likable show.

What's on: Thursday

2007-06-28T14:51:00.000-04:00

OK. I should be leading with something else, but honestly STUDIO 60 ON THE SUNSET STRIP (NBC/10 p.m.) wraps up its first and only season tonight after being kicked in the teeth a few times by the network. This was the 2006/07 season's best new show and could be the best written show on TV right now (not that it's actually on TV at this point, but whatever). It's the fourth part in a well done story arc. Aaron Sorkin, please come back soon.

USA comes out firing with a new show tonight -- BURN NOTICE (10 p.m.) is about a spy bounced from the CIA and left with nothing... he takes up private investigating... I think. It's not really clear. That follows the finale of THE STARTER WIFE (9 p.m.), which I never had the energy to pick up.

Oh, and I can't forget HEY PAULA (Bravo/10 p.m.) ... a new reality series about American Idol judge and ex-pop star Paula Abdul. The first two of seven episodes are on tonight. This should play well to the Girls Next Door crowd...

Also new: Pirate Master on CBS; 5th Grader on Fox; TNA Impact on Spike; the NBA draft on ESPN.

De Niro plays the bull...

2007-06-28T13:25:00.001-04:00

Fine, you don't want to weigh in, then you'll just have to listen to me... or just comment later... Either way, I'm gonna blow some big plot points so if you haven't watched Wednesday's Rescue Me yet, STOP HERE.

Big week for the best show on TV through this lame-o summer. And it didn't seem that way at the beginning of what would have been a pretty standard episode if not for the chief's storyline. Even Tommy's psycho-dad bit was relatively normal for this show. (I was really prepared for a nose-ring tearing that would have sent me screaming into the early morning, rain-soaked streets.)

It was, however, interesting to see that the boyfriend is a nice guy and to have a solid example of Tommy being totally, shamelessly unreasonable and self destructive in front of his friends. But Leary does play an awesome crazy dad, doesn't he?

While trashing his relationship with his daughter, Tommy's also having trouble getting together with his rescuer (whose name i forgot to jot down and I can't find on imdb). The nice lady carried him out of the burning house, saving his life, and the show would have us believe that this has him emasculated enough to turn her down, which is a common trend in Leary's work. I tend to think Janet has more to do with it than Tommy's letting on -- and so does his general fear of finding another strong woman who won't put up with him or another crazy woman like Sheila (who he's ALSO still holding out hope for). And this new woman's honestly the best shot he probably has at being happy. But Tommy's destined to crash every single relationship he has.

As great a character as I think Franco is and as hilarious as Teddy can be, I really don't care about their respective storylines right now... anyone else? Teddy's off on a silly tangent trying to get away from his new wife and intruding on a corrections officer who talked him into the wedding... and Franco's busy blowing a good relationship for no apparent reason. Yawn.

And don't even get me started on how the probie's story went nowhere. I had high hopes for the show to honestly tackle assisted suicide instead of having it peter out. It's sad that Shawn had the most interesting developments this week -- finally standing up to Tommy, though weakly, in regards to the fight with the emo kid, and making headway toward a normal conversation with him.

Then there's the chief, and the sad conclusion. I hate saying "I saw this coming," because no one ever believes anyone who says that, but it seemed pretty obvious to me, especially after he risked his new position to quickly scuttle away Tommy's problem and made a heartfelt toast in support of his gay son who had dealt him a staggering disappointment.

I was cringing for the entire second half of the episode because I was afraid that it was coming. The chief has been the most human character on the show, and his stories over the past few years (his wife's Alzheimer's, his son, his health problems, and most recently his job loss) have been the show's real grounding in reality. The depression of all these things finally weighed down on him, and his decision to kill himself is not surprising after getting to a point where he'd lost absolutely EVERYTHING he held dear.

His wife is no longer the same person; his son's never going to change; his career as a firefighter is reduced to sitting at a desk, and he can't be with his crew, which is all he really wants. It's a sad and scared but artistically acceptable end for Jerry.

Sadly, that's not even the most disturbing thing in this week's episode. Nope. More disturbing is that I was actually AT the man-date restaurant with a group of guys on Saturday night... good salmon.

House on fire

2007-06-28T03:16:00.000-04:00

I'm too sleepy to get my head fully around last night's Rescue Me right now. But I'll use this post and hopefully get some discussion started on this blog (I know you're reading, so put in a cent or two on...

...the chief
...Tommy's sad reluctance to be with his rescuer
...Tommy warming up to Shawn
...Tommy's relationship with Colleen
...the show's dialogue

Anyone?

Full post this afternoon.

What's on: Wednesday

2007-06-27T13:55:00.000-04:00

I don't preach wrestling very often because I know it's a mindless fixation of mine, but if you're a fan, you should be aware of WWE's MSG CLASSICS (MSG/8 and 9 p.m.). The WWE opens up its massive video vault to put together hourlong presentations of old events at Madison Square Garden. I'm pretty sure these are new episodes, but it's all old content, so it really doesn't matter. Tonight's main events are Hulk Hogan vs. Kamala and Roddy Piper vs. Rick Rude.

Even more obscure is PBS' presentation of the ceremony awarding Paul Simon the inaugural Library of Congress Gershwin Prize (9 p.m.).

Also new: Last Comic Standing and Dateline on NBC; So You Think You Can Dance on Fox; Next Best Thing, American Inventor and Traveler on ABC; two hours of Hidden Palms on CW; Bear Island on PBS; Lil' Bush on Comedy Central; Rescue Me on FX; Top Chef on Bravo; Ghost Hunters and Destination Truth on Sci-Fi; and two episodes of Tyler Perry's House of Payne on TBS.

I have no more clever Lot headlines...

2007-06-27T03:01:00.000-04:00

It seems to me the contest they're putting together is uneven if they're going to split the contestants into groups and hand each group different tasks (comedy this week, ... it becomes luck of the draw. Most of these people are pretty good, too, which disappoints me.

Luckily, Jessica got dumped in the pre-taped ousting -- another change due to declining ratings. I hate that the show is being so inconsistent.

Doctor in Law (Shalini): For someone with no confidence, she hit a home run! Clever idea, well executed and overall pretty strong. I wish it could have been longer and more developed, but for two minutes, she gets high marks.

Discovering the Wheels (Adam): Sort of dumb idea that came off better than it probably was. There were a few good laughs, but nothing hilarious. First time I actually recognized an actor in any of these flicks... but that's not the point.

Nerve Endings (Will): The silent film gags Will uses continue to make me laugh. He's got to be the best storyteller in the bunch. I'm worried he may fall on his face when forced to work some dialogue in, but he's still gotta be safe at this point.

Under the Gun (Hillary): I haven't liked anything she's done yet, I don't believe. She seems to slip by every week. And... oh, look... she's filmed crap again. The whole idea here was completely lame, and I don't think I noticed a laugh at all.

(Open side note to Fox: Please, please, PLEASE make Gary Marshall stop trying to be funny.)

How to Have a Girl (David): Last week went kind of rough for him. This was a million times better (and included TWO actors I know this time). The judges are dummies. I laughed more during this than any of this week's other flicks.

Die Hardly Working (Zack): Cute, kinda funny, but not as much as I expected. I think it could have gone even a little farther... maybe if he'd had more time to stretch the idea out. Anyway, I can't trash it, because I liked it a lot. Man this reminds me of my college job managing a movie theater...

I worry that David will go home, but honestly I don't think it would be absolutely terrible. Adam was cruddy, but not as cruddy as Hillary.

Darn -- I wish this show were longer. It's really getting short changed. While America's Got Talent gets two-hour jaunts every week, the show about something people actually care about (movies) is being completely ignored. (Homework: I'm looking for thoughts on why this is...)

What's on: Tuesday

2007-06-26T15:07:00.000-04:00

Premiering tonight is SHAQ'S BIG CHALLENGE (ABC/9 p.m.). It's one of those feel-good "reality" shows... this time starring basketball star Shaquille O'Neal who will work with a group of overweight youngsters to get them in shape. It's supposed to be talking viewing kids into being healthy, too, though I think watching TV is probably an unhealthy way to learn...

New tonight: On the Lot on Fox; 48 Hours Mystery on CBS; two hours of America's Got Talent on NBC; Frontline/World and POV on PBS; Miami Ink on TLC; Dirty Jobs on Discovery; Kathy Griffin on Bravo; ECW on Sci-Fi.

What's on: Monday

2007-06-25T13:45:00.000-04:00

With the hopes that those watching AGE OF LOVE (9 p.m.) will have nothing important to do for another hour, NBC's got an hourlong special SCIENCE OF LOVE (10 p.m.)... the network describes it as "an eligible bachelor dates two separate women -- one chosen by experts based on his biological and psychological makeup, and the other chosen by him based on raw attraction" -- then they see which one he chooses. I'm not sure what to even say about this.

Also new: Hell's Kitchen on Fox; Big Love on HBO; another three-hour WWE Raw on USA; The Closer and Heartland on TNT; Kyle XY on ABC Family.

Theater of the mindless

2007-06-25T12:45:00.001-04:00

Television will never have the capability to challenge people to use their brains the way books do or even the way some radio does (or did, I suppose, before everyone got all oversensitive -- not to mention the old radio serials). But television's big minds have been trying harder, and all that needs to be posed to the audience is one simple question:

What the heck is going on here?

Thank the people behind Lost for making this a common occurrence in the boob tube medium and for proving that a lot of people actually like to be challenged to participate or at least use their imaginations when it comes to entertainment (though, the love-it-or-hate-it crowd surrounding Lost also proves there are quite a few people who DON'T like to be challenged).

Anyway, what I'm saying is that this is a good thing. Star Wars fans proved a long, long time ago that one basic story can plant the seeds in the mind of a fan and spawn thousands of galaxies worth of stories and ideas -- some good, some bad, but all products of an imagination that's being used. That's why I like Lost, and it's also why I'm starting to dig John from Cincinnati.

John is a simpler story, told in same methodically slow form that it's creators used with Deadwood to great success.But there's mystery there that's starting things up in my head, not the least of which surround John himself and the flapping-dead parakeet that can heal people. And all that surrounds a family more dysfunctional than Ben's "others" ever could be.

What's John? An alien? An angel? Or just "slow?" Is Zippy the one with the healing powers? Or is it Shawn? What did John do to Kai? Why is a drug dealer (Dayton Callie is genius in his Calamity Jane-ish character) flying in from Hawaii to keep an eye on the family and why is he babysitting a high-profile, shallow pocketed customer? Why the heck was Mitch floating? What're Luke Perry and his adorable protege up to?

It's refreshing to find another show that makes people think. Cuz most of the time they just follow the story (if there even is a story and not a bunch of dimwits trying to be the best whatever) and hope it gets them somewhere.

What's on: Sunday

2007-06-24T15:35:00.000-04:00

New tonight: Two episodes of The Loop on Fox, Dateline on NBC; John from Cincinnati, Entourage and Flight of the Conchords on HBO; 4400 and Dead Zone on USA.

What's on: Friday

2007-06-22T13:41:00.000-04:00

OK, I can't attest to the quality of the show, since I've never had the pleasure... but the staying power of STARGATE SG-1 (Sci-Fi/8 p.m.) is reason enough for kudos. The series finale tonight is the end of an impressive 10 years.

New tonight: Standoff on Fox; National Bingo Night and 20/20 on ABC; Smackdown on CW; Best Week Ever on VH1; Stargate Atlantis and Painkiller Jane on Sci-Fi.

What's on: Thursday

2007-06-21T03:20:00.000-04:00

David Spade wraps up another season of THE SHOWBIZ SHOW (10:30 p.m.) on Comedy Central. That's really the only thing out of the ordinary tonight.

I'd tell you to watch PIRATE MASTER (CBS/8 p.m.) but you've probably missed too much by now. It's still pretty good for a reality/competition show.

STUDIO 60 (NBC/10 p.m.) is wrapping up a 3-part arc that's been phenomenal. You don't have to believe me. I know.

Also new: Starter Wife on USA; So You Think You Can Dance and 5th Grader on Fox; TNA Impact on Spike.

Conan's been having the bestest guests lately, huh? Tonight it's John Krazanski and Louis C.K. that win him the best-talk-show-of-the-night title.

In the bank

2007-06-21T02:34:00.000-04:00

Here's where I have to offer the big SPOILER WARNING... and I'm too tired to even come up with a clever way to introduce it. So tired that I keep zoning out while staring at a movie on TV. And the commercials during that movie... which makes it not even a movie at all. Anyway, my despise for movies on television is a blog for another day. I think I've gone on long enough that I can now start to talk about Rescue Me without someone complaining I've ruined it for them.

Sheila has always irked me. Since the beginning of the show, she's been annoying and whiny and had that awful snotty air to her (proven again with the perfume spritzing because Tommy "smelled like baby"). It's because of that I think I need to finally acknowledge Callie Thorne's phenomenal performance throughout this show's life. Before I've always just shrugged her off for annoying me, but in this week's opening scene, I finally realized what a great job she's been doing.

It all comes down to the screwed up relationship between her and Tommy. She's in love with him. Completely. In love enough that she spent the bulk of last season drugging him so she could have sex with him, that she guilted him into (almost) having a baby and (almost) retiring, and that the drugging went on so long that it almost got both of them killed. He's still there, though, acting strong but in the passenger's seat whenever they're together. They both play their roles well in these instances.

A bigger testament (more to the writing here) is that she's still able to keep him coming back AND keep him in the dark about what really happened that night (that'll be a great exposition when it comes out). It makes her an amazing, though granted unlikely, villain at the same time she's that whiny chihuahua of a character. They cultivated her well.

She's not the only one who's that strong, either. It's uncanny how great the entire cast is -- Lou's character is really well written, but it's his unbeatable comic delivery that does the job; Shawn is the classic bully target and takes a mental and verbal beating better than most characters. Even the fringe characters are stellar -- this week alone Teddy's wife, Mike's mother; Tommy's date-to-be/savior; Adam Ferrara as Chief Nelson. All of them. You can't dispute how well this show's been cast and put together.

Another one of the show's big successes, aside from the ability I mentioned last week to hit a range of emotions in the span of 10 minutes, is it's ability to treat a throw away verbal jab at someone with the same weight and reverence as a paranoid delusion of a dead relative. Johnny showing up under the covers got even me, and I'm just watching this on TV. Cut to commercial. 13 minutes earlier, quip-quip-quip-tension-quip cut to commercial. Both deadpan. Both serious.

Then there's the pure awkwardness on display on this show is another big plus. Where The Office has bury-your-head-awkward moments, this show tackles moments that feel more real. No one digs themselves as big a hole as Michael does on The Office, but Tommy's deposition (in which he's forced to admit to some ... physical shortcomings) is a real life embarrassment. And don't get me started on Shawn's faux pas by mentioning Tommy's wife in the discussion they were having.

What's on: Wednesday

2007-06-20T13:18:00.000-04:00

I could say it every week, though I shouldn't have to. RESCUE ME (FX/10 p.m.). This year started off better than I could have ever imagined. Watch it.

CBS's tossing everything else tonight for a three hour special: AFI's 100 YEARS... 100 MOVIES (8 p.m.), where they'll again try to tell us what the most important movies are and we'll all just go watch Spider-Man again.

Also new: Last Comic Standing and Dateline on NBC; So You Think You Can Dance on Fox; Next Best Thing, American Inventor and Traveler on ABC; two episodes of Hidden Palms on CW; Lil' Bush on Comedy Central; Mythbusters on Discovery; Top Chef on Bravo; Ghost Hunters and Destination Truth on Sci-Fi; Tyler Perry's House of Payne on TBS.

Dumb

2007-06-20T13:13:00.000-04:00

Cross platform entertainment continues to be dumb. Not since Goldeneye on N64 has an entertainment property been useful on a video game console. That this idea has even come up makes me nauseous. From Hollywood Reporter:

Publisher MumboJumbo has entered into a multiyear relationship with the Universal Pictures Digital Platforms Group to develop mass-market games based on the NBC series The Office.

Developed and published exclusively by MumboJumbo, The Office game will debut in the fall as a PC game sold at retail and available as an online digital download. Next year, the plan is to create additional games based on The Office license beginning with portable experiences for the Nintendo DS and PlayStation Portable.

MumboJumbo CEO Mark Cottam said the company is exploring additional avenues for games based on the Emmy-winning series, including digital distribution via Microsoft's Xbox Live Arcade and Sony's PlayStation Network Platform.

"We looked at the broad demographic that The Office attracts and see this as a TV property that's growing in popularity," Cottam said. "We believe this is a property we can build a franchise around with multiple games across multiple devices for many years to come."

Mike Suarez, vp product development at MumboJumbo, said the first "Office" game would be classified as a task-management game like "Diner Dash." Players will assume the role of Jim Halpert (John Krasinski in the show) and interact with such other characters as Pam Beesly (Jenna Fischer) and Michael Scott (Steve Carell).

Suarez said the game introduces a rival notion that hasn't been seen in the genre, which pits Jim against characters like Dwight Schrute (Rainn Wilson) and brings tension to the gameplay

Ugh.

Best of the Lot

2007-06-19T22:31:00.000-04:00

As if they listened to me, they got the ousting out of the way quickly. Sadly, they tossed Marty. Bad move with Kenny among the group. America, I'm tired of letting you make decisions for me. Honestly.

Another happy note: They got a real director to guest judge tonight -- Wes Craven

Glass Eye (Will): Neat little game with camera work. Like last time he, will owes a ton to the old black and white, slapstick-type silent films. I think his vision works despite what Carrie Fisher had to say.

Blood Born (Jason): What started as seemingly a drug-free America commercial... ended much better than I could have imagined. I don't like that the judges don't like him. He's a good filmmaker.

Sunshine Girl (Zach): It's hard not to feel for a little kid afraid of the dark. I'm not sure this worked as a full story like the other ones so far, but I liked it just fine.

Lost (Mateen): A bit depressing but another good movie. My only argument is some of the acting was off. But it's nothing that most big budget love stories don't stumble over either. He could be the most in trouble so far if only because of the subject matter.

The Orchard (Jessica): She didn't deserve to make it to this round as I recall. How she got Geraldo Rivera to do her film is beyond me (watch the show and you'll get the joke). As for the movie, I didn't get it at ALL.

America, watch this show. Despite Jessica's cruddy effort weighing it down, this was the best bunch of flicks yet. Don't make me come after you.

Jessica should be headed home, though I'll bet it's more likely Mateen gets the boot. Silly voters.

What's on: Tuesday

2007-06-19T12:37:00.000-04:00

Watch ON THE LOT (Fox/8 p.m.). If you like movies, you'll love this show. I think I'm the only one watching it.

Also new: 48 Hours Mystery on CBS; America's Got Talent on NBC; Fast Cars & Superstars on ABC; Miami Ink on TLC; Kathy Griffin on Bravo; Deadliest Catch and After the Catch on Discovery; ECW on Sci-Fi.

Best talk? Conan has Steve Carrell and Flight of the Conchords.

Late night bores

2007-06-19T12:28:00.000-04:00

Everyone's gabbing about the late night talk show jobs that will be changing hands over the next few years... here's that TV.com has to say about everything....

NBC has the most to pay attention to, with Jay Leno leaving The Tonight Show in 2009 and handing over the reigns to Late Night host Conan O'Brien.
The network has undergone a series of personnel changes in an effort to right its sinking ratings ship and could be eyeing The Daily Show's wildly popular host Jon Stewart, says the Web site Broadcasting & Cable.
Citing a network source, the site claims that NBC Universal head Jeff Zucker recently "wined and dined" Stewart and his agent over some "exploratory" talks. Zucker is apparently interested in pulling Stewart away from Comedy Central, who has Stewart on contract until 2008.

Meanwhile, online The Howard Stern Show stenographer MarksFriggin.com gave highlights of this morning's show, in which Saturday Night Live alum Jimmy Fallon allegedly told Stern about his future late-night plans. Fallon, who has long been rumored to be the successor to O'Brien's late-night chair, says a contract has actually already been signed between him and NBC.

Full story here.

This seems to be all bad news to me. Not only does Stewart leave the Daily Show if Zucker gets his way, but if Fallon's telling the truth, there's just another lame talk show host on late night TV.

What's on: Monday

2007-06-18T16:02:00.000-04:00

Aside from the premiere of THE CLOSER (TNT/9 p.m.), TNT also has a brand new offering tonight: HEARTLAND (10 p.m.), a drama centered at a transplant facility in Pittsburgh.

Then, as if television could actually get more inane, AGE OF LOVE (NBC/9 p.m.) premieres. Yes, will the rich, eligible bachelor fall for the young, gold-digging 20-somethings or the 40-something gold-digging cougars. And do you care? I'd like to think you don't, but I'll bet you do.

Also new: Creature Comforts on ABC; Deal or No Deal and Dateline on NBC; Hell's Kitchen on Fox; Big Love on HBO; Oil, Sweat and Rigs on Discovery; WWE Raw on USA; Kyle XY on ABCFamily.

Put your Close back on

2007-06-18T01:46:00.000-04:00

Television has no shortage of cop shows and procedural dramas -- some good, some bad, most on CBS. But with the summer here and fewer young people likely watching television, it's surprising that many networks are ignoring this staple formula for silly reality/competition type shows that run cheap but can't expect to pay off (save the odd Talent) like a scripted show does.

In watching the third season premiere of The Closer tonight (TNT/9 p.m.), I see why TNT gets so much credit for this one. Ignoring Standoff -- which is merely a regular season castaway -- The Closer, by my calculations anyway, is the only procedural crime drama cranking out new episodes at this time of year. And it's a pretty good one.

As this season opens, the LAPD's priority homicide division faces budget cuts that lead them to the loss of all overtime funding (join the club, detectives...) and the loss of one of their own to either retirement or transfer in order to save some extra cash. Deputy Chief Johnson's pretty busy with the murder of almost an entire family -- mom, dad and a 12-year-old girl -- while the 17-year-old son is found nearby and stoned off his gourd (homework: please explain this colloquialism to me).

This type of show isn't necessarily different than your everyday procedural with a brilliant leader (though this time it's a woman) and a team that mixes luck, intelligence, sneaky smarts and bumbling to get the job done. It's much more contingent on its writing than the others are, and, like House, needs that strong personality or it would fall right apart. Luckily, that writing is there and so is that personality. Without them, the show's core -- Johnson's interrogations that always seem to end her way, though she doesn't catch hell in the media like Jack Bauer seems to -- wouldn't be nearly as believable. It helps that the supporting cast has a good number of relatively strong personalities, too.

Seriously, if J.K. Simmons is in something it's worth seeing on principle.

If you're looking to fill the summer procedural void and CSI and House reruns aren't cutting it, this is a strong candidate for your time. I'd never caught an episode before for the simple fact that the idea of TNT, the network I used to go to for my Bugs Bunny fix as a child, couldn't possibly have put together a strong original scripted series. I was wrong.

What's on: Sunday

2007-06-17T13:35:00.000-04:00

Hopefully many of you will agree with me that the most important piece of television to be watching tonight is FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS (HBO/10:30 p.m.). Cool music, dry humor and a combination of the two. I'm praying these guys last as long as my next suggestion -- ENTOURAGE (HBO/10 p.m.), which is back for a new season after a week off (don't make me explain the logistics of that to you).

Speaking of funny, the creators of ROBOT CHICKEN (TOON/10 p.m.) hit the geek jackpot and got to team up with George Lucas, Mark Hamill and others for a half-hour Star Wars special.

Also, I've only just found out about this, but THE LOOP (Fox/8:30 and 9:30 p.m.) is pretty darn funny, too.

For some drama, there's premieres of two USA originals: THE 4400 (9 p.m.) and THE DEAD ZONE (10 p.m.).

Also new: Fast Cars & Superstars on ABC; John from Cincinnati on HBO; Army Wives on Lifetime.

Oh, and if you don't believe me about Flight of the Conchords...

What's on: Friday

2007-06-15T14:53:00.001-04:00

Bob Barker says goodbye in a rerun of this afternoon's THE PRICE IS RIGHT (CBS/8 p.m.). It's the host's final episode before slipping off into retirement after doing the show for longer than I've been alive. It's a nice lead-in to the DAYTIME EMMY AWARDS (9 p.m.). It's gotta be great to have your profession's big awards show on Friday night television...

New tonight: National Bingo Night and 20/20 on ABC; Standoff on Fox; Smackdown on CW; Edge of Existence and Man vs. Wild on Discovery; The Soup on E!; Stargate SG-1, Stargate Atlantis and Painkiller Jane on Sci-Fi; Ultimate Fight Night on Spike.

Important talk show guests: Letterman's got a good show with Michael Moore and hilarious comedian Bill Burr.

Quick reviews

2007-06-14T14:24:00.000-04:00

Rescue Me: I can't even express how gleeful this show makes me. I was nice to the show in my post yesterday, but the premiere episode hit me a lot harder than I even expected. I don't even want to discuss the plot so as not to give it away and waste another one of my clever spoiler warnings. But there are no other hourlong dramas that consistently cause me to pause the TiVo so I can stop laughing -- then five minutes later have me gasping or tearing up or agape at the brilliant story they're telling me.

The only thing that really annoyed me was the first five minutes the TiVo recorded were red carpet interviews with the cast at the premiere. There's no need for that. I'll watch it on the DVD or the TV Guide channel if I even wanted to watch it at all.

Last Comic Standing: I'm really mad at NBC for what they did to this show in seasons three and four. It was an abomination. Seriously. Season three destroyed the show and sent (the genius of the show) creator Jay Mohr away. Season four was just filled with pretty lame comics and the voting system stunk (not that any voting system that would allow Dat Phan to win a comedy contest is stellar by any means).

BUT! After the first episode of this season, I'm happy with the show again. The audition process is always entertaining, so I'm not overly excited. And I'm not really happy with the addition of Bill Bellamy as host and former contestant Ant as a talent scout (I'm cool with Alonzo and Kathleen, but I think you need to be funny to judge comics).

Anyway, I like stand up and I like the base premise of this show. Even Ant's tolerable when he's not doing the stereotypical flamboyant thing for his act. This is a good show if you do, too. Just pray that the funny people get through, because after season four, I was worried that maybe the show had found every funny person and thrown them asunder. OK, I've used the word asunder. I should move on.

Lil' Bush: Here's my problem: The jokes are all played out already. There are some cute moments and some funny gags, but what Bush joke hasn't been told already. That's My Bush was fresh and funny. This is old and a South Park ripoff.

What's on: Thursday

2007-06-14T13:50:00.000-04:00

There's nothing new premiering tonight. But if you like unexciting sporting events, there's always game 4 of the NBA FINALS (ABC/9 p.m.). My lack of excitement for pro basketball is compounded by the fact that this may be the worst championship series in sports ever.

Also new: Fast Cars & Superstars on ABC; Pirate Master on CBS; 5th Grader and So You Think You Can Dance on Fox; Studio 60 on NBC; Showbiz Show on Comedy Central; TNA Impact and Ultimate Fighter on Spike.

Talk show? Watch Leno, who has a killer band, Bloc Party, performing.

What's on: Wednesday

2007-06-13T11:21:00.001-04:00

Good new stuff tonight. First, the continuing fall of LAST COMIC STANDING (NBC/9 p.m.). When this show started, it was filled with (mostly) amazing comics and an interesting way of presenting them. Now it's American Idol for bad comedians. Still probably better than anything else on the networks tonight.

We've already spoken about RESCUE ME (FX/10 p.m.). It's the best thing you'll see all summer. I promise.

LIL' BUSH (Comedy/10:30 p.m.) premieres tonight. Think Muppet Babies meets C-SPAN.

And finally, Bravo brings back TOP CHEF (10 p.m.) for its third edition -- this time in Miami.

Also new: Next Best Thing, American Inventor and Traveler on ABC; Creature Comforts on CBS; So You Think You Can Dance on Fox; Deal or No Deal on NBC; Hidden Palms and One Tree Hill on CW; Mythbusters on Discovery; Ghost Hunters and Destination Truth on Sci-Fi.

Your summer savior

2007-06-13T08:18:00.000-04:00

I may do it every five posts, but I don't like to impose genius status upon people in entertainment. I try not to do so lightly. Argue that point as much as you'd like.

Either way, I have no problem placing Denis Leary among the best creative minds working in television today. Forget his stand-up act (which you've all heard -- and consequently forget the comparisons to Bill Hicks). Forget his amazing film performances (Suicide Kings and Wag the Dog are both pretty awesome). You only need to pay attention to his and Peter Tolan's last two television ventures -- The Job and Rescue Me -- to see what I'm talking about.

The Job fell to ABC's silly demands for actual viewership. But Rescue Me, like many other sweet shows, found a comfortable home on FX. Without that home, it wouldn't have the edge (or bite or whatever you want to call that trait) that compounds the brilliant writing and seriously strong ensemble performance and makes it as good as it is. And by good as it is I mean among the top three shows on television right now and without a doubt the best show on cable.

And thankfully, considering the heaping piles of stale or rotting muck that are filling out primetime lineups right now, it's back tonight. I'm assuming if you don't watch, you have no idea what's going on, so before I tell you that you need to be watching it, I'll get you caught up. (Also, seeing as it's been about 10 months since the big fire, you may need the memory jog even if you do watch.)

So where is everyone? Well, the massive split that had threatened the crew is essentially over -- Franco failed his lieutenant's exam on purpose; Lou's afraid of boats, so the at-sea retirement ain't gonna happen; Mike's transfer decision was never really a decision; Sean's now a Gavin (by marriage) and looks up to Tommy so much that he'll never leave; the chief may be gone, demented after his heart attack, but there's a new one in town. As for Tommy, he was left with Sheila in their burning beach house after she drugged him (AGAIN) and had a breakdown, setting the house on fire.

It seems the new season will open with Tommy defending himself against accusations he started the fire (it doesn't seem they've given away whether Sheila's still alive, but I'd assume not). His ex-wife is pregnant with the baby that could either be Tommy's or his dead-cop brother Johnny. She's not giving it up, either, still reeling from the loss of the family's middle child at the bumper of a drunk driver.

Then there's Tommy's Uncle Teddy, who's still in jail after killing said drunk driver -- and more miserable there than he could have possibly imagined -- and Tommy's dad, who's now apartment buddies with Lou's uncle.

You don't need me to tell you to watch if you already have, because you're either hooked or have been scared off by the show's sometimes-edgy content (though, I completely disagree with calling it edgy; it's realistic, is what it is). If you haven't watched it... well, just watch the show. It's dark and depressing and funny and powerful all at the same time and deserves your precious summer hours. Trust me on that one.

Lots to say

2007-06-12T22:04:00.001-04:00

I've decided -- On the Lot would be great if it weren't for the host, the judges and the theme music. This show could be great in a half-hour form... or maybe on the Web... I should research that, because I think you can watch all the films there. That's probably why ratings are down. Networks don't seem to get that they put all this money into the Web and their viewership goes down BECAUSE of it.

Interesting lot tonight. Maybe not better than last week, but some really promising content. I'm really pining to see longer forms of some of the work of these directors.

Polished (Andrew): Brilliant! Beautifully shown, great miniature story. Only thing that worries me about this film is that they used the best of the week's fare first AGAIN.

Love at First Shot (David): Not thrilled by the look of this one, but I like the geek content, which probably went over the heads of many. I agree with Gary about the pacing being off.

Beeline (Shira-Lee): A good idea, a few cheap jokes and a cute little payoff at the end. Not amazing but not terrible at all.

(Side note A: Guest judge David Frankel is worse than Michael Bay. And if I see our sparsely dressed host at the fake concession stand with the extra dressed as a popcorn-selling teen again I may puke.)

Dance with the Devil (Marty): I like the way this was shot, though I may have done better without the onscreen text when the bad guy spoke and I feel like a lot got left out of any sort of story. In a longer form, I'd probably have loved it. I'm glad he fought back, but he needs a full story.

Edge on the End (Kenny): Looks more like a terrible early 90s music video. Like for a Candlebox song or something. He's got a neat way of showing things, but he's not the mainstream type of director they're looking for on this show. David Frankel said his only smart words of the night terming this a "visual poem."

Who's going? Probably Kenny, considering his competition, but there's room for David to fall off, too.

Oops

2007-06-12T15:06:00.000-04:00

Hey, sorry reader. I know the paper says I'm writing about On the Lot today, but it's not on till tonight, so I'll take care of it then.

What's on: Tuesday

2007-06-11T23:56:00.000-04:00

So, I'm told ON THE LOT (Fox/8 p.m.) is struggling. Give it a look. The judges stink, but the films are entertaining.

TLC (no longer the Learning Channel, now the bikes and cars channel) has the premiere of season three of MIAMI INK (10 p.m.).

Also new: Fast Cars & Superstars and NBA Finals Game 3 on ABC; 48 Hours Mystery on CBS; America's Got Talent on NBC; Kathy Griffin on Bravo; Deadliest Catch and After the Catch on Discovery; ECW on Sci-Fi.

Cin city

2007-06-11T22:49:00.000-04:00

In hopes of putting together the massive, analytic, important review of the premiere of John from Cincinnati. I can't actually do that.

Yes I took a whole day to watch the show and I could have watched it 10 times. Truthfully, I watched it one and a half. It was tough to pick up on the first time so I restarted about half way through.

Here's what I know. It's about a family of surfing royalty -- three generations of the Yosts. The eldest, Mitch, hurt his knee and never surfed in public again. His son, Butchie, became famous and then followed drugs back to obscurity. And Butchie's son, Shaun, is a star rising faster than HBO board members' worries (about the executives, not the show... yet).

They're safely in the realm of dysfunctional. Enabling grandma Cissy wants Shaun to follow his dreams, but everyone else is worried he'll end up like his father. Their friend Bill is an ex-cop with what seems like PTSD. And then there's John, who arrives at the show's opening as if from nowhere. He picks up English quickly from his surroundings, but it's not clear why he only knows three phrases when he shows up or where he came from (the show's big mystery, it seems).

And that's it. There's some story and character development that I won't get into. It's really not important. The real problem is, the show is a little slow moving, and I can't judge it on just one episode. I'll continue watching (though I probably wouldn't if this show'd arrived during the regular season) and report back later. Until then, I honestly recommend you take a look at the show. You'll recognize some familiar faces if you're a displaced Deadwood fan. You'll also recognize a familiar writing style.

What's on: Monday

2007-06-11T14:20:00.000-04:00

Only one premiere that really matters tonight: BIG LOVE (HBO/9 p.m.) returns for its second season. HBO's gonna need shows like this one to step up, and it seems to be building a following.

And, in the less-important cable station bracket, alien/teen angst show KYLE XY (ABC Family/8 p.m.).

Also new: Ex-wives Club on ABC; Creature Comforts on CBS; Hell's Kitchen on Fox; Dateline on NBC; Kyra Sedgwick is the guest on Inside the Actors Studio; Oil, Sweat and Rigs on Discovery; and a three-hour WWE Raw on USA.

Salud

2007-06-11T02:30:00.000-04:00

You would not believe what I went through today for a simple hour of television.

I knew walking in to work today that the wires would be abuzz with news of the Sopranos finale. Sure enough, the story's on our front page as you wake up today. Luckily, I was charged with another section of the paper, but still a simple message to the newsroom -- pointing out that my last name happens to end with a vowel and there could be consequences for ruining my evening that may or may not include me dreaming of the culprit as a fish at an inexplicable Asbury Park boardwalk fish market -- served as my meager protection from the only piece of news I was really interested in this evening.

I knew it was possible to make it through the evening, as someone had pulled off a full shift without finding out who'd won American Idol.

Things started getting behind and I was forced to work on the Sopranos story on my PC without actually looking at it -- moving it from e-mail to the page. I have my co-workers to thank for keeping me blissfully ignorant. Still, I didn't get out of the newsroom until about 12:30 a.m. and was then detoured to Wawa for bread so I could have a sandwich. I sang audibly along with "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" in the store in case the many goofy looking meatheads in there decided it a great place to ruin my night.

I'm pretty proud of myself. I've never been successful at such a clean getaway. I've actually had multiple Survivor episodes/finales ruined in circumstances surrounding work. But I also haven't been so excited for an episode of the Sopranos since I was in college (not that that was eons ago or anything).

If this lead-in hasn't been long enough to slow you down, I'll now warn you that if you read any farther, you will encounter SPOILERS. (That may have been my lamest spoiler warning yet.) Anyway, I feel my excitement was warranted. And, of course, it was met with what I'm usually met with when the show's credits roll -- ambiguity.

Not that the show wasn't successful. Seriously, I don't think it could have ended any other way. The aggravation that's permeated the past few seasons may remain for some people. But if it is, I think that means you never really got the show. If you expected a big payoff, you REALLY never got the show.

In fact, the show closed on what may have been the most suspenseful moment in its history -- Tony, seated with his family for dinner, watching his back. Just like he always has. Fans are left with the same uncertain future as Tony is. Will he go to jail? Is New York still coming for him? Who knows. But he's as content as he ever could be. He's comfortable with his family's current place: Meadow's choices. AJ again saved from himself. And Carmella still... there.

We finally see his closeness to Janice. And, more importantly, he's done all he could at this late hour to make peace with Junior. And all this from a guy who's lost another best friend to this thing. But what's a thug to do when his life and his work are indistinguishable.

Yeah, the family's stories all folded up nice and tight -- though AJ's may take a bit more to swallow after all that buildup. Paulie, too, makes a sort of peace with the boss in another entertaining appearance, and he gets the respect he was begging for just a few years ago without even trying this time.

As for what I'd like to have seen, it's not important. Plus, I went in with fairly few expectations. But if you're reading, that's what I'd like to see comments on. I'm interested to know what disappointed anyone and what readers may have thought just HAD to happen. (OK, one of mine would have been to see Patsy get it after bailing on Sil like he did.)

The finale can certainly be remembered for some classic Sopranos scenes, too. Tony and Junior, specifically, if only that the great exchanges between the two get one more airing, even if it's a tragic one. Another AJ bashing scene (with a little yelling at Meadow for good measure). An extremely sad moment as Tony visits his comatose cosigliere/childhood friend.

Maybe the funniest moment in Sopranos history pops up as well: "We might actually win this thing!" coming out of the mouth of Agent Harris. And, of course, what will be the most memorable whacking of however many seasons there've been. (Fare ye well Philly... you annoyed the heck outta me.)

It was a fitting, entertaining finale to a show that may have gone on just a few episodes too long. That's OK, though, it'll still be remembered fondly by all it's fans -- most of us in New Jersey (seriously, what other show allows you to watch and at some point exclaim "Hey, I bought my car around there" or "I know that Quick Chek").

And there's good reason for that fondness: It was probably the most captivating show of its time. And who knows what happens at HBO now. You thought losing Six Feet Under and Deadwood was bad...

What's on: Sunday

2007-06-10T11:46:00.001-04:00

More new stuff than you can hope to watch, but it's the old that's the most important. Tonight, we say goodbye to THE SOPRANOS (HBO/9 p.m.). After all this time, here's hoping we get some resolution. It's a little longer than the customary hour, so check your TiVos.

The winner of the best-lead-in-ever lottery is the premiere of JOHN FROM CINCINNATI (HBO/10:05 p.m.). It's from the guys who made Deadwood, so there's a ringing endorsement right there. I'm ALMOST more excited about this than I am the Sopranos finale.

HBO's biggest competition is Broadway's big night -- the TONY AWARDS (CBS/8 p.m.).

Back in business on Fox tonight is THE LOOP with two new episodes (8:30 and 9:30 p.m.).

If you like funny people (which would be odd if you're reading this blog...) BRIAN REGAN: STANDING UP (Comedy/10 p.m.) is an hourlong special from one of the best comics alive.

Also new: Fast Cars and Superstars and Game 2 of the NBA Finals on ABC; Dateline on NBC; the debut of Building the Future on Discovery; The Tudors on Showtime; Army Wives on Lifetime.

ABC performs Burkectomy

2007-06-08T14:53:00.000-04:00

From Hollywood Reporter:

Dr. Preston Burke packed his backs on the season finale of ABC's Grey's Anatomy last month. Now Isaiah Washington, the actor who has played him for the past three seasons, is dong the same.

On Thursday, ABC Studios, which produces Grey's, made a decision not to pick up Washington's option for next season.

In his reaction to the firing, Washington channeled Paddy Chayefsky. "I'm mad as hell, and I'm not going to take it anymore," he said in a statement released through his publicist.

The dismissal follows months of speculation about Washington's future on the show after the furor caused by his use of anti-gay slur in reference to his castmate T.R. Knight. Knight recently closed a deal to continue on the hit medical drama.

Full story... here.

Surprised? Don't be. The writers made it easy. Washington made it easy, too. His character was annoying anyway. The softspoken, brooding thing is really just... yech.

Luckily, Sandra Oh is still there to keep the annoying quotient at a tolerable level. What would cheesy primetime drama be without it?

Walls back up

2007-06-08T14:48:00.000-04:00

It's official, from Zap2it.com:

CBS has officially given Jericho new life, but the network is also challenging the show's fans to make it worth the network's while.

Following a fan-led crusade that included buying ads in the showbiz trade magazines and sending some 20 tons of nuts to CBS executives, the show has been given a seven-episode order for midseason. CBS Entertainment president Nina Tassler, writing on the show's message board, acknowledged the campaign was a primary force in the decision.

"Wow! Over the past few weeks you have put forth an impressive and probably unprecedented display of passion in support of a prime-time television series. You got our attention; your emails and collective voice have been heard," Tassler writes. "As a result, CBS has ordered seven episodes of 'Jericho' for midseason next year."

Tassler adds that "in success," there would be a chance to extend the show's life even further. But she also notes that for that to happen, the "loyal and passionate" audience that rallied around the show after its cancellation has to get bigger.

"We will count on you to rally around the show, to recruit new viewers with the same grass-roots energy, intensity and volume you have displayed in recent weeks," she says.

Full story here.

The woman makes a great point. It would be exceedingly hilarious if the show comes back in January and ends up not getting picked up. Seriously. I'll start. WATCH JERICHO. Watch the reruns. Watch the Web content. And be ready to watch when it comes back.

What's on: Friday

2007-06-08T14:27:00.000-04:00

New tonight: Standoff on Fox; National Bingo Night and 20/20 on ABC; Friday Night Smackdown on CW; My Daddy the Crocodile Hunter on Animal Planet; Edge of Existence on Discovery; The Soup on E!; Stargate SG-1, Stargate Atlantis and Painkiller Jane on Sci-Fi; Best Week Ever on VH1.

Again. Watch Standoff.

Not to be Standoffish...

2007-06-08T04:22:00.000-04:00

... but... OK, look. I'm extremely honest when I post here. But I also have a tendency to purposefully, though usually subconsciously act too cool for the room.

The reason I tell you this is that I want you to know that I know that I recognize both of these extremes before I say what I'm going to say, because what I'm going to say may set a few people off (considering the number of responses I've gotten in the last week or so to a post from about three weeks ago).

What's funny is the only Standoff mention in the post was that it's been canceled -- which it has for all intents and purposes. Then a few people from some message board or Web site somewhere found it and started singing the show's praises and campaigning for my three or four readers to watch it and save it. Of that I'm glad -- I've probably gotten more hits in the past week than I have since starting in January. I wish more people would come here to discuss TV. I think I've set up a fairly welcoming abode.

Anyway, that's why I'm dedicating these few grafs to Standoff, which returns on Fox tonight at 9 p.m. (after a Bones rerun) to burn off the remaining episodes the network paid for but really doesn't trust with serious, important time slots. Nah, Fox has shows like So You Think You Can Dance and Hell's Kitchen to save those posh 8 p.m. weeknight time slots for.

When you can't even get a weeknight spot in the summertime, well... that's a bad sign. Much like my beloved and underappreciated Studio 60 (which, since I'm on the subject, was awesome again this week), Standoff got a bad time slot even post-sweeps.

See, I like Standoff fine, but -- and I fully encourage disagreement here -- it's nothing spectacular and it's gone.

Get over it.

Seriously, it's a procedural show, same as CSI, Law & Order and House. Standoff IS A PROCEDURAL SHOW. It's masked as a romantic comedy, but that's all it is.

I give it credit for being funny and entertaining; I give it credit for having some amiable characters; I give it credit for keeping my interest. But it's far from being as good as other new shows this season like Heroes and Ugly Betty. Heck, new shows that got canned, like Six Degrees, Jericho* and Studio 60, topped it. Fox just doesn't make good original content. And why should it? No one watches good original content. They watch American Idol, Dancing with the Stars and Shark (couldn't resist my chance to take another swing at that piece of junk).

If you've read this far, it's probably time for me to tell you I'm going to be watching Standoff tonight. I DO enjoy the show. Thoroughly. And I'm sad it's going away. I would love for 30 million people to watch it tonight and the network eat its words and pick the show up again. Or maybe to have all the Internet fans come up with a clever campaign like the Jericho thing. But it won't happen. But that won't happen when the show's on at 9 p.m. on a Friday. I'll be at work putting out the paper for Saturday morning. And if I wasn't, I'd be at a bar on the boardwalk. I'm just being honest about the big picture here.

Standoff is fun and entertaining and cool, but it's really nothing original and there'll be another procedural that can campaign on how it's slightly different than all the rest and how its overall story is better than House's drug problems or Grissom, Mac or Horatio's leadership skills. It's only three months away. Two and a half, really. Unless you're only watching Fox. Then you have to wait until baseball's over.

* I contend Jericho counts in this argument. If you disagree... well... don't disagree.

What's on: Thursday

2007-06-07T14:41:00.000-04:00

I will not type out the entire name of tonight's first new summer show. The shortened version is annoying enough. FAST CARS & SUPERSTARS (ABC/8 p.m.) debuts right before the NBA finals kick off tonight. If reality TV wasn't bad enough it heads off to Middle America's favorite pastime -- NASCAR. The show brings celebrities like Jewel, William Shatner, Tony Hawk and WWE champ John Cena with it. Pro drivers will try to teach the stars to race.

STARTER WIFE (USA/9 p.m.) runs its third hour tonight. Sorry, I planned on reviewing this one I just haven't had time. I think anyone who would have picked it up didn't need my opinion though.

Also new: Pirate Master on CBS; 5th Grader and So You Think You Can Dance on Fox; Studio 60 on NBC; Showbiz Show on Comedy Central; TNA Impact and Ultimate Fighter on Spike.

Payne, lack of innovation and ... well, just read.

2007-06-07T13:09:00.000-04:00

Tyler Perry's House of Payne: I realize I'm not in this show's main demographic. I'm nowhere near it. But, there's still a difference between good TV and bad TV. Tyler Perry's House of Payne is bad TV.

I can't tell if the show is supposed to be making fun of archetypal sitcoms, but it'd be bad either way. The show's dripping with bad acting, lame joke writing and laugh track. It's hard to make a sitcom original, but I would have thought it really hard to make one so unoriginal. Apparently you can take random characters from various sitcoms and fill their mouths with random lines from other various sitcoms.

I'm not familiar with Tyler Perry's film work, which is very popular, but I would hope it would be more original and/or entertaining than this...

American Inventor: Is there no way to make this type of show any different? I'm not even going to bother, and I'd hope you won't expect me to. I would never ask you to watch it either.

Destination Truth: FINALLY! Something worth your time (and mine). I love when they give a bunch of geeks some cameras and a show, and this one (in a time of desolate television landscape) is especially sweet.

These geeks (with full on Blair Witch-type camera work -- which may be a drawback for some people) open the show with a trip to Papua New Guinea to search out reports of a dinosaur in a village on a remote island. The village brought out the cavalry for this thing as the host explains, which is why they take this report as credible. (They also check out reports of a mermaid-type creature.)

It's a little bit documentary, a little bit corny(the narration is cheesier than it needs to be, but tolerable), and extremely dweeby (they've already referenced Lost). Obviously, if they'd found something significant, the news would have already picked up the story, but it's still really cool and better than anything else that was on Wednesday night.

If you like stuff like Mythbusters or Ghost Hunters, block out an hour on the TiVo for this one.

What's on: Wednesday

2007-06-06T13:19:00.000-04:00

ABC premieres another search-for-the-best show: AMERICAN INVENTOR (9 p.m.), with judges Sara Blakely, Pat Croce and George Foreman. I may not even bother considering this show for review purposes. If you disagree, let me know.

Then, on Bravo, skip over season three and jump right to TOP CHEF: 4-STAR ALL-STARS (10 p.m.), where four each from seasons one and two compete. Season three starts next week.

I don't really check out TBS much, but they're ramping up with more and more original content. Tonight brings the premiere of TYLER PERRY'S HOUSE OF PAYNE (9 p.m.). Two episodes will kick off the show by the guy who's made millions in films and is probably headed for TV success just because of that.

And then there's the premiere of DESTINATION TRUTH (Sci-Fi/10 p.m.), which focuses on the search for answers to Bigfoot/Loch Ness type mysteries.

Also new: Ghost Hunters on Sci-Fi; an HBO Sports doc on Barbaro; Mythbusters on Discovery; Hidden Palms and One Tree Hill on CW; So You Think You Can Dance on Fox; Next Best Thing and Traveler on ABC.

Real crap

2007-06-06T13:06:00.000-04:00

I don't think I can watch another reality show this summer. Someone help me out. What makes it worse is both of these are back for sequel seasons. I think it's time to forgo the TiVo for a few months and just rely on British TV. Ahhh... Life on Mars.

America's Got Talent: Okay, so my first thought when I turned this show on is: WORST PRODUCTION VALUE EVER. It hasn't even actually started and I already don't care. I just wanted to put that out there in case I don't get through two hours of this. Back in a second.

Right. I got five minutes farther and they called Hasselhoff "one of America's greatest entertainment legends" in front of the tune from the Kill Bill trailer. Talk about blasphemy. That's like saying something nice about Gwen Stefani over a bed of Zeppelin or Hendrix. Okay, despite my disgust, I'm really going to try to watch now.

Okay, it's me again. Ten minutes later. This is no different than any search-for-the-best-whatever show. And Hasselhoff just used the word "rubbish." I'm officially done. Sorry. Call me a bad TV writer. I call me a human with a brain.

Drat, and now I've just noticed this is my 300th post. What a waste.

Hell's Kitchen: The things I watch for this blog. Seriously. Somehow, Fox figured out a way to make reality television even more ridiculous. It is not a "saga" as the announcer says. None of the contestants will "wish they were never born." I will also not "tune in next week."

I get it: He's mean. They're learning. The show's editors are clever. And everyone's acting goofy.
I watch enough TV to know what I'm getting from these two presentations, so please excuse me if I don't actually finish watching any of them. I'll pay you back, I swear.

I'm getting tips now...

2007-06-06T03:30:00.000-04:00

So after a text message expressing disappointment in my lack of journalistic go-gettiveness, I awoke from my PlayStation-induced hibernation and found this on the wires... the most comprehensive and attributed story from TV Guide/LA Times, via TV.com:

If TVGuide.com's Michael Ausiello is correct, it appears that CBS executives may be listening to the pleas of its viewers. The gossip hound says that "multiple sources" have indicated that CBS is very close to greenlighting a deal to bring the Skeet Ulrich vehicle back to the airwaves. The agreement would allegedly bring the show back for eight episodes, possibly as soon as mid-season.

When CBS left Jericho off its 2007-2008 schedule, fans of the show went ballistic. Online petitions were signed, message boards were flooded, and CBS execs had their e-mail boxes bloated with pleas to renew the show. But the most creative ploy saw fans sending nuts to the corporate offices in defiance. The idea was spawned from the show, when Ulrich's character replied "Nuts!" to a neighboring city offering the post-apocalyptic town a surrender.

*snip*

As far as extending the number of episodes, eight would not be enough for Jericho producer and creator Carol Barbee, according to the Los Angeles Times.

"The idea would not be to bring it for eight and out, but to bring it back for eight with the hope that it would keep going," Barbee told the LA Times. "They're making deals with the actors and there's other logistical stuff to work out, too. Swingtown was supposed to take over the same stages so it's a lot about the logistics of how to work out a schedule that works for all of us."

Full article here. Or, for the AP's version, try here.

Needless to say... yay.

Direct to TV...

2007-06-06T02:30:00.000-04:00

So three weeks of five-way competition seems like the track for On the Lot for the next few weeks. Doesn't sound like a bad idea to me. In fact, it makes it a little more interesting that chances you'll go home increase significantly.

Broken Pipe Dreams (Sam): Seriously well done. I hate to hand out a best-flick-of-the-night this early... I always hate to do that with a show like this because I don't know what else is coming. But I'd bet right now that it will be. I really felt bad for the character, more empathy than suspense. And it still worked.

I'd hate to think he would take cues from Michael Bay on editing or any type of good filmmaking (that any one of them would take cues from Michael Bay). I'm ignoring everything he says. I'd rather listen to Carrie Fisher. And Carrie Fisher really irks me.

Teri (Trevor): Trevor annoys me. That didn't help his film. But I don't really think anything could have. Stupid joke dragged out too long and done before. Please send this guy home.

The First Time I Met the Finkelsteins (Hillary): Based on previous performance
I'd expect little from this one. Bad acting really made it pretty lame. I was happy to see someone skew a bit edgy, but despite a couple good lines it wasn't really funny.

Dough: The Musical (Adam): Nearly no plot. Writing helped, but I didn't even care about the two characters. I just wanted it to end.

I don't think Gary Marshall knows where he is half the time. He didn't get the joke in the last flick (saying they should look at each other without realizing she wanted nothing to do with him) and he liked the movie. Maybe I should stop paying so much attention and I'll enjoy these more.

Laughing Out Loud (Shalini): I think this will hurt her. Amazingly good docu-short. I like the subject and I like that it's different. If she goes home, I'll be convinced America really doesn't understand movies. Wait, what am I talking about... America likes Borat. All is already lost.

If Gary Marshall mentions how important female filmmakers are again, I'm going to drive to Hollywood and smack him.

I say Hillary should and probably will go home. Though, I wouldn't be sad at all if Trevor goes. Anyone else?

Quick review

2007-06-05T15:16:00.000-04:00

Take interviews with the best and brightest middle America has to offer and make it look like they're coming out of the mouths of claymation animals. That's CBS's Creature Comforts.

It's based on a British show (that was based on a film) and run by the guy who did Wallace and Grommit and Flushed Away. Good start for a little half-hour throw away type show. It's helped by the fact that it can be really funny at times (and even funnier when you're picturing the people who're actually saying this stuff).

For an easy visual, imagine a discussion about the type of nose a certain wine has -- but coming out of the mouths of a pair of dogs sniffing another dog. Or a laboratory rat discussing medical care. Or a pair of horses talking about pheromones.

It's cute and funny and is on the brink of being OK for families. Most of the time the entire atmosphere they create on screen has a lot to do with the comedy. I'll continue to watch, though its potential for consistency is questionable.

What's on: Tuesday

2007-06-05T14:30:00.000-04:00

NBC has the only premiere tonight, with the two-hour kickoff of AMERICA'S GOT TALENT (9 p.m.) with new judge Sharon Osbourne (whose 15 minutes continue inexplicably) and new host Jerry Springer (who deserves another 15 minutes or so just for comedy's sake).

Eva Longoria hosts the ALMA AWARDS (ABC/9 p.m.) -- that's the American Latino Media Arts in case the MTV movie awards didn't satisfy your need for Hollywood back-patting.

Please don't think I'm supporting this show's existence, but I feel it's my journalistic duty to point out the premiere of KATHY GRIFFIN: MY LIFE ON THE D-LIST (Bravo/10 p.m.) season three. It follows an hourlong comedy special from comedy's resident chihuahua.

THE SHIELD (FX/10 p.m.), at the same time, wraps up its 6th season with Vic headed to a review board hearing. Sadly I've just missed another whole season of this well-liked show. It's an hour and a half long in case you'd like to check on your TiVo.

Also new: Deadliest Catch and After the Catch on Discovery; ECW on SciFi.

Talk show pick? How about Paul Rudd on The Daily Show.

The long con

2007-06-05T02:02:00.000-04:00

THERE'S SPOILERS IN THIS HERE BLOG. YOU'RE WARNED.

I thought I had it in me to sit here and pontificate about the greatness of The Riches to you for a while. And I could, but it would probably sound just like it does every other time I blog about a show I really enjoy. In brief: FX, yay... strong characters, yay... brilliant writing, double yay. It's not the greatest, but for the past three months I've looked forward to watching every week.

When The Riches premiered, it as simply another cool FX show. I don't think I'm the only one who'd never heard of Travelers -- American gypsies of Irish decent -- and was pretty intrigued by the idea of a show about such a group. Con artists are entertaining characters to begin with.

Anyway, to keep you from falling asleep thanks to a long post, for this look back on season one there's only a one point that needs to be made to best highlight the show (which, for the record, didn't need to leave a cliffhanger to bring people back next season).

Here goes: The show is nothing like anything else on television. It's constantly changing, going from what seemed to be about a family of con artists to a story about a family that just wants to be accepted. This is a good thing, and a bad thing for the show. It's kept things fresh, without a doubt, but things moved fast through the season as the family has assimilated into their new lives. That leaves a number of milestones in their journey in the rear-view.

If things stay as they are, the show will need a short run to be considered strong. They're running deep into the well of bad stuff that could happen to the Malloys in their current situation. But then, I should probably have faith in the creative minds behind the show working a little more magic and redefining everything one or twelve more times.

As far as the finale goes, I was a bit disappointed. The real Doug Rich's friend Pete is more annoying than anything (he may even deserve the brutal beating it seems is coming from Dale if it makes him stop the whining). I get the feeling he'll eventually learn the whole truth and latch on... even more annoyingly. Dale on the other hand may end up with more power than most viewers might want him to.

(Side note: Eddie Izzard and Minnie Driver are absolutely amazing in this show. Their play off each other alone is worth applause, but they've each crafted a pair of characters -- and together crafted a relationship -- that is beyond what anything on television is doing right now. And I used to hate Minnie Driver.)

(Side note two: I'm extremely happy that the show never made the kids superficial. They're as much in this situation as Wayne and Dahlia, and they've shown up and stepped up accordingly.)

What's on: Monday

2007-06-04T12:55:00.000-04:00

Few new shows tonight, starting with claymation show CREATURE COMFORTS (CBS/8 p.m.). A new summer show that's NOT a reality show from the guy who did Wallace & Grommit. Sweet.

Fox's HELL'S KITCHEN (9 p.m.) returns tonight, and includes a New Jersey caterer Vincent Fama, 30, of Milltown. The contestants will be split up into teams of men and women and one will go home before the premiere is over.

Even more important is the season finale of FX's THE RICHES (10 p.m.). A seriously amazing drama that I've been hooked on. We'll talk more about it tomorrow.

Also new: Inside the Actors Studio with Julia Louis-Dreyfus; Oil, Sweat and Rigs on Discovery; Monday Night Raw on USA.

Late night? Try CONAN (NBC) who has Paul Rudd and Kings of Leon.

Endgame

2007-06-04T01:39:00.000-04:00

LET THIS BE A WARNING. IF YOU LOOK BELOW THIS LINE I'LL HAVE RUINED THIS WEEK'S SOPRANOS FOR YOU. PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME THE TiVO POOPER.

So after years and months and weeks (in whichever order of those you choose) it's here.

Something is HAPPENING on the Sopranos. And, so far anyway, it looks like the big action packed ending that fans are likely waiting for. After a slow plod through the last three seasons the Soprano family is at war with New York. We lose two characters that I don't believe anyone could have seen losing.

But, oh, wait, we have to deal with Dr. Melfi first. Tell me if I'm wrong, but does she bring the show down or what?! Not only is she my least favorite character (and actor) on the show, but her stories are always so boring and useless.

But she's got guilt and that's our problem, apparently. It's caught up with her after seven years. Finally. She abandons Tony after finding out she may just be enabling him and not helping. I mean, he fits everything in her medical journal to a T. Sure took her a while to notice didn't it? Anything he may do in next week's finale will still be on her head.

Of course, losing his 2nd Carmella (as he pointed out she really was) set him off more than anything else. Speaking of Carmella, she's been pretty annoying, too. Both of them have succeeded in enabling Tony more than enough throughout the years.

On the fringes this week: The sage Agent Whatshisname was more entertaining than ever; Paulie being in charge of the hit is an obvious recipe for disaster, but there's never been such on odd place for comic relief on this show; Janice, while useful to the story for once in her life brought the buzz down yet again (though the Junior storyline is intriguing, though it won't ever really go anywhere... it'll be sad when he's in public housing, but his story closed up a few weeks ago); Meadow remained blissfully unused (besides fodder for the boorish Tony/Melfi story).

Anyway -- the real story. (Which, side note, seems to be really crammed into this episode. It's almost like it doesn't belong after all this time. Even the editing of the show suggests a cramming of content.)

Phil puts a hit on Tony, Bobby and Silvio. Tony puts a hit on Phil. Tony's crew fails miserably. Phil's goes two for two with another at-bat on its way, it seems. What looked like a good position for the Jersey boys turned out to be a big wash. It had me going, I'll admit. But with Tony holed up in a house somewhere, surrounded by what's left of his crew, the odds are pretty staggeringly grim.

As far as Bobby and Sil go -- I don't think they could have picked anyone else that would have made me sadder. They've consistently been strong characters for the show and, seriously, who doesn't love Bobby? Their deaths were both sadly ominous and messy. It's sad to see them both go out like punks -- no chance to defend themselves, Bobby innocently just buying a set of train cars like the big teddy bear he is -- but that's how things are in their world. I'm glad at least they let Bobby be himself and didn't try to bulk him up by inserting him into the battle that's coming. He really never was a thug. Neither was Silvio, to be honest. He was more of a smooth hit man type. He just wasn't prepared.

It's been a long time since the end of a Sopranos episode has had me on the edge waiting for next week. I suppose it's as good a time as any. At the beginning of the season I would have easily bet you there'd be no payoff next week. Now I'm not so sure. The show has painted a beautiful picture and it's ready to smash it over its viewers' heads like a coffee pot (season one or two, I think... great scene).

It seems everyone may have a part in this ending. (Side note 2: It's odd and somewhat fitting that the biggest headache as far as loyalty goes that Tony has had up until now -- Paulie -- is the only right hand he has left). Even AJ, whose lame story up until now this season may turn out to have a point after all.

As far as exactly what's to come, I don't think it'll matter. I think what will matter is that there'll be some finality to the show. And that may be the most surprising thing of all to some people.

What's on: Sunday

2007-06-03T14:14:00.000-04:00

So the networks have nothing for you tonight. Nothing at all, unless you're looking for a commercial-laden Bad Boys II. But no one watches movies on TV anymore.

Let's see. Comedy Central has the premiere of LARRY THE CABLE GUY: MORNING CONSTITUTIONS (8 p.m.)... an hourlong comedy special. If you wanna call what Larry does "comedy."

Then, obviously, there's the penultimate THE SOPRANOS (HBO/9 p.m.) and the season finale of ENTOURAGE (10 p.m.). Don't worry. Entourage is only taking a week off for the premiere of John from Cincinnati. If you want to get technical this is the end of the second half of the third season of Entourage and you'll see the fourth season kick off on June 17. As for Sopranos, there's nothing I can do to make you feel better. There's only two episodes left.

Oh, yeah. The MTV MOVIE AWARDS (8 p.m.) are back tonight, too. Live for the first time incidentally. That's the only reason I'm TiVoing it. This stopped being a viable television watching option to me years ago. I quit my job to get the night off to see this when I was 15. Wow, what a dweeb I was.

Also new: The Tudors on Showtime... and... um. Yeah, that's all